


my only working remedy

by YesIsAWorld



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Actor Harry, Boys Communicating, Coming Out, Explicit Sexual Content, Famous Harry, Football Coach Louis, M/M, Non-Famous Louis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-14
Updated: 2016-08-18
Packaged: 2018-08-08 15:03:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 42,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7762471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YesIsAWorld/pseuds/YesIsAWorld
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry is a famous actor, and the media portrays him as a lothario who sleeps with every woman he meets. His Team steps it up a notch when Harry is in between movies and they do a promo by launching the contest “Win a Date with Harry Styles!” Everything goes wrong for Harry's Team when the winner is a guy, Louis Tomlinson. But for Harry, everything goes right.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [irishvelvet](https://archiveofourown.org/users/irishvelvet/gifts).



> Thank you for the great prompts irishvelvet! I hope I've done this justice.
> 
> Also, thanks to [HippoBunny](http://hippobunny.tumblr.com/) who does [LarryFanFicCovers](http://larryfanficcovers.tumblr.com/) for the amazing cover!
> 
>  
> 
> **Please do not post this fic or any of my other fics on any other websites. I'm not currently allowing translations either. Thank you for respecting my wishes.**

Harry slammed the rolled magazine on the breakfast table. Gemma, his sister, startled while pulling a mug from the cabinet. “Good morning to you too,” she said. He didn’t respond. The tabloid unrolled when he released it, displaying the colorful cover. One picture took up most of the space; Harry in tiny yellow swim trunks with a string bikini clad model draped over him. The bold font teased the story: “HARRY STYLES LEARNS VICTORIA’S SECRET: More pics from their sexy Bahamian tryst inside!” Gemma and his personal assistant, Niall, had stood right next to them, telling them to scootch closer when the paparazzi’s boat neared, but, obviously, they had been cropped. 

Gemma slid him a steaming mug of black coffee and ruffled his hair. He hated when she did that. “Remember that ceviche?” she asked, indicating the magazine but pointedly ignoring the cover story. “God, that was so good. Think we could find a restaurant that serves something similar? Maybe in Malibu?”

“Bet I could whip up something close. Might take a few tries though.” He shrugged as he blew across the top of his mug. 

“Could go out,” she arched an eyebrow, “find a cute date spot?” 

Not this again. Harry knew she meant well, but she really needed to drop it. Even if there was a guy he liked enough to take out on a date, that would be it. A serious relationship was a laughable proposition right now, now matter how much he wanted it. 

Harry let out a dry laugh. “Apparently I have enough of that.” He pushed the magazine across the table. His eyes glinted, able to give as good as he got. “I could drop some hints with Nialler, though.” Harry wiggled his eyebrows and Gemma ducked her pinkening cheeks into the fridge.

A peppy Irish accent spoke behind him. “What about me?” How was he always so chipper first thing in the morning?

“Oh, Gemma and I were just talking about—”

Gemma stood up abruptly. “Today. We were going over today’s plans.”

Niall slid into a chair next to Harry, “Yeah! Last day on set. You want me to go with?”

“Maybe for a bit. We’ll have to make sure all my shit makes it from the trailer to my car.” In the past few years Niall had gone from PA to best friend, only friend, really. Harry’d be lost without Niall’s insanely quick memory and calendar skills, plus his ability to put anyone at ease. Tensions would surely be high on his last day: Harry knew the director was going to overshoot to make sure he had all the coverage he could possibly need in edit. He needed Niall by his side.

Harry didn’t want to think about the stupid movie. “Maybe you could stop by the fish market though, Gem here is in the mood for ceviche.” Harry hid his smile behind his coffee mug. 

Niall glanced at Gemma then quickly snapped his eyes back to Harry. “Uh, sure. Or, let’s find a good restaurant instead, to celebrate the end of another successful shoot…”

Tricking them into meeting at romantic spots was almost too easy. “That sounds great. Reservations at eight?”

Gemma stepped out of his way as he stood to get ready for the day. “Don’t you have—?“ 

“I’ll stop by the cast party after,” Harry assured her, though he had no plans to miss the well-publicized party he was contractually obligated to attend. Somehow the two of them would have to make do without him. 

▵▵▵

Louis rushed into the pub, throwing the door open and startling the couple standing directly inside. He ducked, his hands splayed in apology. “Oops, sorry mates!” He stood on his tiptoes and scanned the room trying to find the lads. Sometimes his height was a real disadvantage. As he was giving up hope and realizing that he’d have to walk a lap to find them, he saw Liam’s hand shoot up. Louis nodded in acknowledgment and started his fight through the crowd to the back corner. 

He greeted the table. “Soz. Got caught up after practice.” The five boys, Liam Oli, Calvin, Luke, and Andy all rolled their eyes and started ribbing him.

“What’s the excuse this time?” Luke smushed closer to the other boys so Louis could slide into the bench. 

He thanked the boys for pushing a cold beer his way. “Practice was a disaster. We started late because there was a fight in the locker room. Then no one would tell me what it was about.” That part didn’t honestly bother him so much, he understood sticking together as a team no matter what and trying to work through team issues without getting a coach involved. “And then they just didn’t play cohesively at all, it was like three different teams all fighting for control.”

Andy shrugged, “Probably just an off day. They were probably distracted by the fight.”

“What kind of fight?” Oli asked, “Like, some shoving or an an actual fist fight?”

“Bloody noses, black eyes. They better heal before Wenger sees or my head’s on the line.” Sometimes all he could do was shake his head at his life. Arsène Wenger, Arsenals’ Head Coach, was his boss. Discipline was at the top of the list these days and he’d rather not lose his job over rash teenagers. He still had a lot to learn from Wegner. “Anyway, they had to do extra sprints at the end as punishment. So, see, it’s really not my fault I’m late.”

It wasn’t quite so simple, there was more to it, of course. He loved all the lads, but there were some things he didn’t want to get into while sitting in the crowded pub. And he wasn’t sure they’d all _quite_ understand anyway. He pushed the stress to the back of his mind and dove into the beer. 

He tried to focus on what the rest of the table was discussing, but debating the best attributes of the group of girls clumped at the bar held no interest for him. None of the guys in his eye line were worth discussing either, to be honest. 

When he finished his beer he stood to get the next round. A few of the lads raised their hands for another as well. He waited patiently for the barman to finish up some complicated-looking cocktails and idly looked around the rest of the pub. No one stood out to him, as usual. The barman made his way over eventually and got started on Louis’ order of beers and a double tequila shot. Beer alone wasn’t cutting it. 

While standing at the bar, he swallowed down the shot and managed to suppress a shiver as the liquor made its way down his body and warmly settled in his stomach. He gathered the cold pints and made his way back to the table. 

“Took you bloody long enough.” Calvin’s arm shot out for one of the drinks. 

Louis hoarded the glasses in front of him. “Oi! None of that! I’ll drink it if you’re not appreciative.” 

“Cal’s just pissed that none of them were interested.” Luke moved his chin in the direction of the girls. “His chat up failed, as usual.”

“Ah, shouldn’t have gone without his trusty wingman.” Louis slid one over to Calvin. 

“What about you, Lou,” Liam asked. “You need a wingman tonight?”

Louis shook his head. “Nah. Not on the lookout tonight.” He was still on his self-imposed dating hiatus after one too many hadn’t worked out. 

Some nights they kept nagging, but thankfully they dropped it. He just wanted a lads night out without everyone picking and choosing who they’d like to take home. He didn’t think it was too much to ask for. 

As the night drew to a close, Louis offered to get the last round and some chips to split. Liam joined him on the walk to the bar. “Everything okay?”

“I’m fine. Can’t get that practice out of my head.” 

Liam threw an arm around his shoulder; he was always such a solid presence in Louis’ life when he needed it. “We’ll chat later, yeah?”

Louis accidentally made eye contact with a guy on the other end of the bar. “Oh, shit!” He couldn’t remember his name, but they had gone out a few times and it hadn’t ended well. “Fuck, don’t look. Whatshisface is here. That arsehole.” 

“Who?” 

Louis kept his eyes averted and hissed when Liam turned to look. “Maybe he didn’t recognize me. Fuck.”

It was just Louis’ luck when the man sidled up beside them at the bar. He stuck his hand out for Liam to shake. “Xander.” That’s it, Xander. 

“Liam.” 

“You must be new.” He gave Liam a once over. 

Louis moved to stand between them. “Please just go. There’s nothing else to say.”

“Just warning a guy…” Xander brought his attention back to Liam. “This one’s a cock tease. Wouldn’t waste your time if I were you.” 

Louis’ stomach plummeted, a rolling mass of shame and anger and the tequila shots that, in retrospect, were probably not a great idea. How dare he?

Luckily Liam found the words stuck in Louis’ throat. “Fuck off, yeah. Seems like whatever happened Louis made the right choice. Where do you get off?”

“Not on him, that’s for sure.” He rolled his eyes and turned to walk away. Liam was faster though, and managed to drench Xander’s whole side with one of the newly poured beers on the counter. 

Xander whipped around in anger, face red and mouth drawn up in a snarl. The rest of the lads were at their side in an instance, forming a barrier around Liam and Louis. He backed down when faced with Louis’ crew and slunk back to his corner. 

“He’s not worth it guys.” Louis diffused the tension. “Come on, let’s get out of here.” They left then, both Liam and Luke slung their arms around Louis and the rest followed close. 

Liam tucked in close to Louis’ ear to console him, voice barely louder than a whisper, “I wouldn’t put out for a dick like that either. Forget about him.”

Louis gave him a weak smile. “Thanks, mate.”


	2. Chapter 2

Everyone in the large conference room was carrying on private conversations while they waited for the meeting to come to order. Harry was trying to pump information from Niall about his night out, but Niall wasn’t giving up any details. 

Nice? _Nice?_ That was a terrible descriptor for a night out with Gem. “Come on, Niall. Really, how was it?”

“I don’t know what you want me to say. It was nice,” Niall repeated for the third time, still not making eye contact. “How was the wrap party?”

Harry needed more specific questions. “Fine. Same as always. Got to dance a bit. Did you at least get some ceviche?”

“Actually, no.” 

He wasn’t getting anywhere. He needed a new tactic. But then they were shushed by the table full of disapproving Suits. How did they all know at the same time that the meeting was starting?

Ben’s voice boomed across the room. “The results are in. Your name has been Googled more times in the past three days than in the previous two weeks combined.” Harry’s agent wore his smuggest smile, which accentuated his capped, overly white teeth. He was a caricature of himself. “I told you this was a good idea.”

Harry picked at one of the tabloid magazines scattered around the large table, the same one he binned at home, ripping a row of tears along the bottom. “But Google’s not telling them anything. If the only results that come up are my relationships and not the roles I’m in, I just don’t see the point.” His stress-induced stomach pains started right on schedule. 

Ben pursed his lips. “You know exactly why. Right now your roles are based on teenage girls falling in love with you. Gotta keep you desirable and give them enough pictures to line their lockers and bedroom walls.”

“You’re underestimating them,” Harry argued. This meeting would be like all the others, his team talking down to him like maybe he just hadn’t understood the first thousand time they explained it, and he’d fruitlessly fight back against his image they were perpetuating. “Plus, I just got a call back for _Rebound_. Thanks for the congratulations by the way,” Harry barely tried to keep the sardonic tone under wraps. “It would expose me to a whole other audience.”

James cut in, “We told you this would be the last promo stunt for a while.” He wanted to believe his manager, he really did. James had been by his side since he starred in _Oliver_ at the Manchester Royal Exchange a million years ago. James was just as far out of his element as Harry was, if he was being honest, but he needed at least one person on his team who was at least trying to look out for him. 

It wasn’t going to be the last stunt. 

“Can we just drop it for now?” Tears of frustration welled in his eyes and he _really_ didn’t want to break down in front of his team. It was all too much. It had been four straight years of ‘no homo’ stunts with no end in sight. It was a parade of models, singers, and actresses that he’d been linked to, one after another and he never got used to it. 

“We don’t have any other romances lined up at the moment,” Ben said.

Niall scoffed. “At the moment.”

Harry spoke up, “What about roles? Anyone have any good scripts for me to read?”

James sighed, visibly happy for the subject change. “Of course, there’s a stack right here for you.”

“Great, in that case we’ll get out of your hair—” Harry rolled his chair back so he could flee back to the comfort of his bed and focus on reading the scripts. 

Ben cleared his throat. “We do have one other thing to discuss.”

Niall sat with wide eyes and confusion on his face as the newest stunt was spelled out. Harry’s head throbbed. 

He was to be raffled off as a prize. 

The winner of “Win a Date with Harry Styles” was going to win him. 

While he sat in stunned silence, measuring how long it would take to bolt out of the door if he did actually get sick, the team took turns explaining that fans could upload either a piece of art or an essay describing their perfect date with Harry, along with a small fee, to be sure they were _serious_ entries. Then a winner would be picked… somehow… no one seems to have thought through the finer details of the contest, and the winner would be flown to LA and go on a well-publicized date with their idol. 

“No.” Harry and Niall stated at the same time when the pitch came to a close. 

“He’s not going to be auctioned off to the highest bidder like a cow,” Niall exclaimed at the same time Harry emphasized “absolutely not.” The team tried again, telling him how it would make him seem more approachable, and how wonderful it’d be if the fans thought a ‘regular girl’ had a chance to be with him. 

The fact that he’d never date a regular girl because he was gay, seemed to be completely beside the point. As did the point they had been stressing earlier about his _teen_ fans. Did the team forget that he himself was no longer a teen? Plus, Harry was perfectly approachable. Fans came up to him all the time; he was quite proud of his reputation for being exceedingly nice to fans. They still hadn’t convinced Harry when the meeting drew to a close. “Just think about it. We’ll talk next week,” Ben said as he walked them through the glass doors. 

It was going to happen whether or not he thought it was a good idea, and whether or not he approved. 

He was exhausted. 

▵▵▵

That night Harry, Gemma, and Niall sat around the living room eating takeaway and watching an old Friends episode. Harry sat tucked into his favorite purple leather wing back chair while Niall and Gemma shared the sofa. Niall technically had his own flat, but the four-bedroom Spanish-style house Harry bought after his first million dollar paycheck was far too big for him alone. With Harry’s legs folded under him, leaning against a wing, the smell of leather surrounding him, he could almost be back at his grandad’s house. At least he didn’t have to be alone every night in a still-foreign country. 

“There’s gotta be some way out of this,” Gemma contemplated as she tried to pick some chicken up with her chopsticks. 

Harry rolled his eyes. “Sure. When has there ever been a way out of anything?” 

“Okay, so it’s unlikely that we’ll be able to get you out of this, even with James’ help,” Niall conceded. Harry knew Niall’s brain was processing as he paused for a few bites of his noodles. “But it seems as though they haven’t worked out all the details, so let’s see what you can get out of it.”

Harry put the empty carton down on the side table and picked up his tumbler of gin and tonic. He drank the last remaining, watered down, sip. “What do you mean?” He needed another if they were going to talk about this instead of zoning out in front of the telly. “Anyone else need a refill?” he shouted from around the corner. 

When the clinking of ice cubes stopped, Niall shouted back, “I mean, they were talking about that fee, right? Which of course is total bullshit, just another way for them to line their bank accounts.” 

“Seriously!” Harry cried as he rejoined them. “What the fuck is that? A new low, even for them.”

Niall sat back and poked around his takeaway carton. “What if... you insisted the money go to a charity?”

“The Malala Fund!” Gemma exclaimed. “It might as well go to a worthwhile cause if they’re going to essentially steal from your teen girl fanbase.”

Harry’s heart raced at the prospect. “If the fee is five dollars, and even a thousand people entered that’d be five k.” He loved his best mate. “Niall, this might be your best idea yet!”

“You know it’s going to be more than a thousand too.” Gemma clapped excitedly. “You have to convince them, Harry, you have to.”

“Also,” Harry sucked in his bottom lip as he figured out his wording, “If there’s essays and art who is going to be the judge? I’m sure some pieces will be lovely, we all know how talented the fans are, but...” He let out a cough and hoped they picked up on what he was alluding to so he wouldn’t have to spell it out. 

Niall started laughing. “The porn! Oh god, can we please make them go through those fan fics?”

Harry felt his face flush. “I definitely don’t want them reading that. Or seeing that! Some of that artwork on Tumblr is alarmingly accurate.”

Gemma groaned then chucked a throw pillow at Harry. “Gross.”

“Should just be random, I think,” Niall chimed in. “They’ll be too many anyway for anyone to pick out a top ten, let alone one single winner. They should pull the names out of a metaphorical hat.”

“Mmm.” Gemma swallowed down a bite. “Also, hopefully that will keep it fair, none of the stalkers or Suits’ neighbors should win in that case.”

Harry downed his refilled glass. It wasn’t a perfect solution by far, but if he could convince them on these points, the charity especially, then it might just be worth it. 

▵▵▵

Louis heard the kids from all the way down the hallway. Every Saturday, and during the week when his schedule allowed, he volunteered at Mosaic, an LGBT+ center. The teens he mentored were normally loud, but this was a whole new level. The excited shouting and shrieks were almost ear splitting as he walked closer and opened the door. The room was chaos. All he made out of the ongoing conversations were the words “Harry Styles,” “contest,” and “date.” It was like Willy Wonka had just announced the Golden Tickets. 

“What is going on?” he shouted, still barely able to hear himself over all the noise. He flicked the lights a few times and slowly the kids quietened. “Care to tell me what’s gotten into all of you?”

“Your favorite boy! You could win a date with him,” Mike said.

Louis laughed. “What are you on about?”

The groups surrounding him shoved a phone into his hands. “Look!”

He read the display:

> WIN A DATE WITH HARRY STYLES!
> 
> The famous heartthrob, Harry Styles, is now accepting submissions for his next girlfriend. The British actor, 21, has released details on how you, yes you, could be next on his list of conquests. Follow this link for all the specifics on applying for the position of a lifetime! You’ll need to submit an original piece of media, either fan art or a piece of writing that illustrates your ideal date with the idol.
> 
> Please keep all submissions G-Rated! You can’t help but wonder if Mr. Styles has indulged in a fan fic or two to issue that warning. 
> 
> But as we all know, the best things in life aren’t free. A small donation of $5 is required for entry. Hopefully it’s not enough to break the bank for anyone interested. We’re willing to bet that you’ll raise a pretty penny for The Malala Fund, where all proceeds will be donated. 
> 
> What are you waiting for? A good cause with the chance to go on an actual date with a real-life silver screen idol is waiting for you! Start creating and good luck!

Louis read through it twice before he looked back up at the kids, still not understanding what this had to do with him. “He’s already dated all the available women in Hollywood?” Louis joked. He returned the phone to its rightful owner and sat on the nearest table, feet swinging below, as the kids gathered around him. 

“Louis, we’re going to enter you in this contest.”

“Why would you do that?” Louis laughed. “Maybe I already have a boyfriend.” He definitely didn’t. His last date, months ago, was an utter bore. The guy before that was alright, until it turned out he was an arsehole like the rest of them. 

Jordyn rolled their eyes, “Yeah, right. You definitely do not have a boyfriend. You get all…” they wiggled their fingers, “sparkly, when you’re getting some, so we know you’re not.”

Louis’ mouth gaped open. “What?”

Sarah backed them up, “We all know it’s true. Don’t try to deny it.”

“Also, we all know about your massive crush on the man. Don’t try to deny that either.”

How often he had talked about Harry Styles in front of them? Harry Styles was exceedingly gorgeous, but how did they all know that he was exactly Louis’ type. How much had he inadvertently shared with these kids? “I mean, I think you can save your money, although that is a very good cause, but you know they’ll pick someone less…” He hesitated, “like me.”

“You never know,” Mike sing-songed. 

Louis was surprised when Alec spoke up. She was new and hadn’t yet come out of her shell. “What’s the worst that could happen? A few pounds go to charity.”

“Odds are impossible, but someone has to win. Why not you?” Jordyn asked.

“Also,” Louis interrupted everyone else who looked poised to marry him off at a moment’s notice, “have you not seen every other magazine cover? It’d just be depressing to go out with him; he’d be checking out every girl that passes by.” 

The kids all looked at him, eyebrows raised, unimpressed. 

“I mean, I can use that time to ogle him. I’m sure he’s even more gorgeous up close, but still.” Louis was missing something. 

Then they all spoke at once: “Haven’t you been listening to us at all?” “Everyone on Tumblr knows.” “Worst kept secret in Hollywood.” “Have you never heard of PR?”

Louis could not be more confused as he tried to pick apart their shouting. “What are you on about?” 

“He’s obviously gay!” Mike exclaimed. 

Jordyn elbowed Mike. “Not straight.”

“What?” Louis surely would’ve picked up on that if it was true. 

Alec rolled her eyes. “He always brings his mom or sister to a red carpet event.”

“And, he never uses pronouns when describing his perfect girl, it’s always ‘they’ or ‘someone.’” Jordyn chimed in. 

Sarah said, “There are some great quotes, when someone suggested female was a good trait in a partner he said, ‘not that important’ or when he claimed to be a butt man instead of a boob man.”

“That doesn’t necessarily mean anything,” Louis argued. Although “not that important” was a pretty clear statement, if what they were saying was true. 

They all waited for him to concede the point. 

“I still don’t want to be entered into this silly contest, but okay, I’ll at least consider that he’s not straight.”

Mike laughed. “You’re the adult. You’re supposed to know when the media is lying to us youngins.”

“Hardly an adult,” Jordyn sassed. 

Louis scoffed. “I’ll have you know, I am a very proper adult. I even plan to attempt some laundry this weekend. I won’t even drive it up to my mum’s next time I go visit.” It wasn’t entirely true, most of his weekend was going to be spent with Liam on their sofa playing FIFA, but they didn’t need to know that. 

▵▵▵

Harry’s team meeting was not going at all the way he expected. Normally he’d be either bored out of his mind as the table full of lawyers argued the finer points of his contracts or the PR team would present him stunt options while he quietly seethed. This might be the best meeting of his career. Despite experiencing how invasive it was to be recorded without his knowledge, he still wanted to surreptitiously record the Suits whose emotions ranged from incredulous to irate. 

Ben, who had came up with this whole silly idea, was more upset than anyone. “How did this happen?” he sputtered, his face red. 

Harry shrugged and failed to hide his shit-eating grin. He smacked his gum and enjoyed the show before him. 

“There must be a way to pull another name. Find someone else. What are the fucking odds?” 

James shook his head. “Nope. Since the money is getting donated, there was an accounting firm hired to make sure this was on the up and up. The only way to get someone new is if we prove we’ve made strong attempts at contacting the winner and they didn’t respond.” Harry itched to pat James on the back; he was so proud of him.

Ben threw his papers across the table, then stood to look out the wall of windows facing downtown LA. “What are the odds? Seriously, this is my fucking life. What are the chances a goddamn man would win? Did you see his fucking entry? Did you? All that rainbow crap. We can’t show Harry on a date _with a man_ next to that imagery in a magazine. Are you kidding me? We’ll lose half our fan base in an afternoon.”

Harry’s amusement morphed into anger, “Seriously? Do you have any idea at all what my fans are like or are you just using ‘proven’ ideas that have been regurgitated since the fifties? Most of them won’t care as long as I’m happy. And those that do, honestly, I don’t want as fans.”

“Not this again.” Harry didn’t even recognize that guy down the table. 

The fight dragged on late into the afternoon; the Suits refused to back down from the position that it would hurt Harry’s image. Harry, James, and the lawyers kept repeating that regardless of their preference, the winner won. 

Harry fiddled with his phone, sent a text to Gemma that they’d be late for tea, and it hit him that his team was so out of touch that they couldn’t even imagine a scenario in which a man entered, let alone won, their ludicrous contest. 

James attempted to bring the battle to a close. “Look, if he won and there is nothing legally you can do about it, then this argument is a waste of our time. We’ll try to contact him, and maybe it was a fake or a joke or he’ll back out. If so, you’ll get your way. If not, then you do your job, so, as you put it, Harry won’t ‘lose half his fan base in one afternoon.’” Harry hoped the rest of the room didn’t catch the wobble in his voice toward the end. James was on his side, as always. At least his _entire_ team wasn’t incompetent. 

Harry pulled Niall in close and whispered, “Can’t believe we might have actually won this one.”

Niall smirked, “You, on a date, in public, with a man? You’re going to be so relaxed and happy; it’ll be a whole new you. Your fans are going to know in an instant. Won’t even need to plan a coming out.”

Coming out. Harry pushed that wish to the side; it would be years away, at the very least, if he was ever allowed. At least today would be a mark in the win column.

Niall still wore a grin. 

“The micro-expression gifs. Oh my god.” Harry let out a laugh at the thought. “I hope this bloke is attractive. He probably has no idea what’s he gotten himself into. Jeez, they’re going to pick him apart for sure.”

“Are you going to scare him away by warning him?”

Harry wasn’t sure. “I’ll have to weigh the situation out. It will probably be nice to at least give him a small heads up of what to expect, um, after, the date.” A date. With a man. It was almost too good to be true. 

▵▵▵

Louis was the last one left in the locker room. He crammed the last of his dirty practice clothes into his gym bag. He was going to have to do a wash soon; when _he_ recognized that the kit was rank he knew it was way past time. He debated whether or not he could stuff his cleats in as well when his mobile rang. 

The blocked number piqued his interest. “’ello?” He tried to adjust the phone while throwing the bag’s strap over his shoulder and jostled it away from his ear. “Sorry about that, didn’t catch that, who is this?”

“Oh, um, sorry,” a deep voice drawled. “This is Harry Styles.”

“Very funny. Mikey, is that you?” Louis rolled his eyes. This was the lamest prank that the kids had come up with so far. “I know I’m running a little late, I’ll be there soon.”

“No, please don’t hang up.” The voice on the other end sounded a pitch away from desperation. “I was calling about a contest that you may have entered.” 

“Wait, who is this?”

“Harry Styles.”

He didn’t hang up. Louis stood with his head cocked and phone cradled between his shoulder and chin, and waited for the other person, who he still doubted was Harry Styles, to continue.

“Um, you entered a contest, right? God, this is embarrassing, to win a date with me? Is this Louis Tomlinson I’ve reached?”

There was no way… “Um,” Louis was just as flustered as Harry sounded and returned a similar set of questions. “Yes, I did? I mean, I think I might have? What’s going on? Is this for real?”

“It’s real. It’s really me, I mean. Will you, uh, still go on a date with me?”

Louis took a seat on the long wooden bench. Were the kids still having him on? “What? I mean, it was supposed to just be for a good cause. I wasn’t supposed win.”

“I’m in if you are. It’ll be a nice change of pace, honestly.”

“I’m sorry, this really isn’t a joke?” Louis couldn’t wrap his brain around what was happening. 

“Really, really not a joke. Since there was money involved there were lawyers and accountants overseeing it. Sorry, by the way, about that fee.”

“The charity aspect isn’t quite what I’m focused on now. Do you know that I’m pretty sure I’ve seen all your movies? Your poster is on my childhood wall.” The embarrassing confession slipped out before he could stop it. 

Harry laughed. “I’m glad you’re a fan. I was worried I’d end up with someone who put in a joke entry.” Louis refrained from telling him that was exactly what had happened. “Maybe if I tell you what to expect it won’t seem so surreal.”

“Pretty sure it’ll still be surreal, mate, but yeah, go ahead.”

“Okay, so it’s actually pretty convenient that you’re in London. I’ll be back in two weeks when ADR wraps. So if you’ll agree basically what will happen is that I’ll pick you up. That’s like, the gentlemanly thing to do, right?”

“You’re the one who’s dated all of Hollywood, you’d probably know better than me.” Again with the lack of filter; this was going terribly. The silence on the other end was deafening. “Sorry, that’s not…”

“Uh, yeah, so some paparazzi will catch me picking you up, uh, then there will be more pictures when we enter the restaurant, and then again when I drop you back off. Pretty simple. Since they’ll need pictures for the write up there really isn’t any room for uh, spontaneity or whatever.”

Louis could listen to him talk for hours; his voice was like molasses. “Seem easy enough.” It didn’t: it sounded awful. Paparazzi and published pictures and having to make actual dinner conversation with a real-life movie star? He was honestly going to kill those kids. 

“Look, I know this is going to sound a little desperate, but it’d actually mean a lot to me if you’d agree to do this. I can explain later, but yeah, I’d love it if you said yes.”

Louis was nothing if not a sucker for polite men begging for dates. “Okay. I’m in.”

They hung up after Harry promised to be in touch with more specifics, and Louis promptly banged his head against the lockers. This was going to be a disaster.

▵▵▵

Louis threw himself onto his unmade bed. He rubbed his hands over his eyes and pinched his arms. Nope, still not a dream. Harry Styles. The actual Harry Styles who both he and his sisters had pinned up to their walls, who was a fantastic actor—Louis should know, he had downloaded all of his movies—Harry Styles, who his teens claim was gay, or not straight at least, had called him. On his mobile. That Harry Styles. Harry Styles had his phone number. _And_ told Louis that he would call him back. He was expecting a phone call from Harry Styles. The same Harry Styles who all but begged for a date with him, Louis Tomlinson, who hasn’t had a date in over six months. How did his his life come to this? 

He grabbed the nearest pillow and covered his face before letting out a scream. 

Louis texted Liam _come home and entertain me. Bring beer._ He then composed himself enough to get up and make his way into the bathroom to shake his head at his reflection before getting in the shower. This was definitely a joke, right?

Despite Liam not returning his text, he walked into Louis’ room less than an hour later. 

“What’s happened now?” Liam asked as he fell into Louis’ bed. “I saw your cryptic tweet. I can’t tell if it’s good news or bad.”

Louis groaned. “I have no idea. I think it’s terrible news, if I’m being honest, but terrible news that I am way too excited about.”

They moved to the living room and Liam opened up a pair of beers before putting the rest in the fridge. He passed one over to Louis, who rolled it in his hands before taking a sip. How to explain this…

“I have a date.”

“That doesn’t sound so terrible.” Liam shrugged. “You haven’t been on a date in forever. Buck up, it’s like riding a bike, you’ll be back in the saddle before you know it.”

“I’m going to ignore that innuendo. It was truly awful.” Louis downed half his beer before he continued. “A date with Harry Styles.”

Louis waited for Liam to place the name. 

“ _The_ Harry Styles?” Liam asked, confusion written all over his face. 

“ _The_ Harry Styles,” Louis confirmed, wondering if there would ever be a time when he could think about Harry Styles without his last name. Going on a date tonight with Harry. Oh, I didn’t mention it? Yeah, he’s an actor, you may have heard of him. No. That was not a possibility in this lifetime. 

Liam’s face was still screwed up in a question mark. “I don’t understand.”

“My gay kids,” he said, referring the teens from Mosaic, “entered me into this contest. It was for charity—a joke really—but then I won.” He brought the bottle to his lips and chugged what was left. “So today Harry Styles called me and asked me out on a date. Want another?” He shook his empty bottle. 

Liam held up his mostly full one, “No, I’m good. Wait. Harry Styles called you?”

“That’s right.”

“What is your life? Who else would this happen to? When is the date? Doesn’t he live in LA now?” 

Louis threw up his hands as he made his way to the kitchen. “All excellent questions—the same ones I have! The worst of it is that it’ll all be documented, for like magazines and websites and stuff. So, I’m basically about to embarrass myself in front of the whole world.” He continued as he came back across the room to the sofa, “You know how terrible my dates normally are. This will be terrible too, but then extra terrible when I have to live through it again the next day in the news.”

“What are you going to wear?”

“Oh, God!” Louis moaned and banged his head on the back of the sofa, “Fuck, I hadn’t even thought of that. Guess we need to go shopping.”

“And also…” Liam was extraordinarily focused on his beer bottle. 

“Spit it out, dad.”

“You’re not out at work.” 

Yeah. He’d have to figure that out as well. 

▵▵▵

Luckily for Harry, this Louis guy lived in London so Harry got to fly back to the UK for the date instead of sending Louis to the US. The poor guy lost out on a free flight to LA but he hadn’t seemed upset about it, claiming he was too busy to travel now anyway. 

Harry’s LA house was gorgeous, but it echoed and didn’t quite fit the current version of Harry. His flat here in London was perfect. It was the right size and in the middle of the bustling city and he never felt like he was hiding out when he came back between jobs. Building out the kitchen with the contractor took forever, but the results were worth it. Every appliance and drawer was perfectly placed for convenience and comfort. 

His kitchen was perfect for stress baking. 

Shaving down carrots for a carrot cake kept Harry’s fingers busy and his mind mostly focused as he tried not shave off his fingertips on the mandoline. His mind kept flitting to his closet. His outfit had been laid out for days. Harry, his stylist, (Whose bright idea was it to hire a stylist with the same name? The confusion it caused on event days was unparalleled.) pulled it all together and told him not to swap anything out. 

He couldn’t help but second guess it anyway. He was so stupidly nervous for this date. He checked his phone, again, and there was still nothing from Niall. He sent a second text _where the hell are you? need you to talk me down from the ledge again._

His phone dinged with a message. _10m_

He mixed the rest of the ingredients with the carrots then slopped the contents of the bowl into the cake pan. He drummed his fingers on the countertop after he put it in the oven and set the timer. Niall never estimated properly; he had at least fifteen more minutes to wait. So, he marched to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of wine. 

He was on his second glass when Niall let himself in and joined him in front of his closet. 

“Mate, I promise you, Harry knows what he’s doing. You’re not picking a second outfit.” Niall grasped his elbow and dragged him to the bed where they sat, knees knocking. “How many meet and greets have you done? This is just another fan. You’ll charm the pants off of him.”

Harry groaned. “I Googled him.”

“You what?” Niall screeched. 

“I know. It was such a mistake. If it’s the right one, he’s fit as fuck. I’m going to make such a fool of myself.” Harry swirled the wine in his glass. 

“I’m going to take that.” Niall pulled the glass from his hand and set it on the night table. “You’ve done this a million times. Pap walk. Dinner. Friendly goodbye. You can absolutely do this.”

“But it’s a date. With a guy. I have no idea what I’m doing.”

“Harry, listen to me.” He waited until Harry maintained eye contact before he continued, “Not to burst your bubble, I know you’re excited, but… this isn’t really a date. He’s a fan. This is promo. I don’t want you to get your hopes up that this guy is _it_ for you. Just promo. You won’t see him after tonight.”

Harry knew Niall was right. He had to put on his Harry Styles Charm and get through another night of promo. Harry’s brain recognized Niall’s words for what they were, but his pounding heart and twisting stomach had yet to get the memo. 

▵▵▵

Louis had nervous energy coursing through his veins. He didn’t think that all this was worth it and regretted saying yes to Harry. 

He had long given up his childhood fantasies of fame, and he cringed at the idea of this being his fifteen minutes. He couldn’t stop bouncing his knee or swooping his fringe or flipping his phone through his fingers as he waited for the hours to pass. Liam finally kicked him out of the living room when the energy was rubbing off on his FIFA game. 

He thought about wanking as a way to pass the time before his impending date, but Little Lou wasn’t cooperating. He ended up wasting hours scrolling through pages of posts made by Harry’s fans on Tumblr. 

The previous few weeks he spent learning about the Harry fandom on Tumblr had shown him that whoever was paired up with Harry was dissected and deemed to be an awful human for going along with the planned stunts and forced closeting. 

His particular situation was different, he was a nobody picked from a hat, but he wasn’t sure the fandom was going to go any easier on him. 

A huge part of him wanted to call someone back and say he changed his mind, but he couldn’t back out. Harry had sounded so kind on the phone. Like Louis was doing _Harry_ a favor, somehow. Louis only spoke to him twice, briefly, but it seemed like every day there was someone else bugging him about something; from the background check guy, to the social media scan lady, to the non-disclosure lawyers. 

Niall was hands down the friendliest. He asked how Louis was handling all the madness and didn’t believe his first answer of “fine.” His confession that he was actually scared shitless brought out a loud laugh from Niall, who suggested that he wasn’t the only one. They went over the details of the night, seemingly planned down to the minute. After making sure the itinerary was okay with Louis, they laughed that there wasn’t much he could do about it if not. 

Louis wondered if Niall would be a sidekick on their night out. It’s not like this was a real date. He was prepared for Harry to show up with a car full of staff.

Louis had half a mind to send in an anonymous message or two to the ‘Big Harries’ on Tumblr, telling the fans that he was a good guy, not planning to use Harry in any way to promote his own name, but wasn’t sure if that went against any paperwork he signed. He wasn’t all that knowledgeable about technology and wasn’t sure if Team Styles would be able to track those messages back to him. Plus, he felt like a twat even thinking it. 

Louis promised himself that after the date he’d spend days, weeks maybe, off Tumblr. It wouldn’t be impossible since he had gone most of his life without it, although his new daily habit would be hard to kick. And knowing the anonymous users would be talking about him made it so much worse. 

Apparently, it was a slow news day in the fandom, so besides an occasional antsy post that predicted _something_ would happen because it was too slow, it was just reposts of fan art—a good amount of it explicit—stills from his movies, and lots of their favorite candids. He fell down a Tumblr hole and soon found himself at a very NSFW page of realistic looking manips of Harry with other male celebrities. 

His cock started to thicken in interest before Louis even reached the bottom of the NSFW page. Little Lou finally made an executive decision that he needed a wank before meeting Harry later that afternoon. After a few more scrolls, he pulled down his trackies and pants and slowly, lazily, started pulling on himself. He chucked his laptop to the side when he eventually worked up a small sweat, stroking himself harder and faster. Louis finally came with a quiet moan as he arched back off his sheets. He let out a shaky exhale and mindlessly ran his fingers through the come on his stomach. Hopefully that would keep any awkward boners at bay when he saw Harry’s stupidly perfect face in person. He collected himself after a minute or two and finally dragged his legs into the bathroom for a quick shower before he started to get ready. 

An hour later, Liam sat on Louis’ bed and offered encouragement as Louis dressed. After weeks of indecision, and driving Liam crazy with “Which do you like better?” he had decided to wear all Givenchy: a black button down with satin trim around the collar, black trousers, and a black velvet hoodie, since there was still a slight chill in the air. 

He and Liam debated the merits of a quiff versus fringe, and ended up settling on a messy fringe that looked like he spent far less time on it than he actually did. It was embarrassing how long he looked at that mirror. 

Liam begged him to stop overanalyzing his hair, and finally bribed him by lighting up a joint. Louis took a quick hit to calm his nerves and exhaled just as the buzzer rang. He took a cleansing breath before he headed downstairs to make a fool of himself. 


	3. Chapter 3

Louis swung open the heavy door to find Harry standing next to the buzzer system. Good God, he was even more good looking in person than Louis could’ve imagined. Even with all the Tumblr lurking, he was caught off guard by the color of Harry’s eyes. They were _so_ green. Louis definitely needed to find out what brand of mascara Harry was wearing since his eyelashes were perfection. His lips were so luscious. His hair was so thick

He blinked his attention away from Harry’s face and realized Harry was smaller in person. He had a few inches on Louis and had broader shoulders: his whole body lean muscle. Harry wore a white linen shirt with a huge peacock sprawled across the front under a black mohair blazer, and his trousers were maroon chinos. His newly shorn hair was cropped close on the sides and the longer top part was styled to a messy perfection, locks of hair sticking out every which way. 

Louis took this all in and then realized that he was still staring and still hadn’t introduced himself. 

This was half a blind date, where the one participant knew all sorts of facts and tidbits about the other’s life and the other literally had nothing but a name. It was also going to be made public—very public—the next day’s front page news. It was like a sadistic reality show. Halfway down the street he made out a small pack of photographers, three maybe, weighed down by camera bags and hands full of long lens cameras. 

Louis had to speak first but his voice caught in his throat. His mouth felt like sandpaper, that joint was a bad idea. He couldn’t get his eyes to focus on the entirety of the man in front of him. He caught glimpses here and there as his eyes blinked about; the hint of stubble, a flare of the nose, the flexing of his long fingers, the tip of his tongue wetting his lips, rocking back to the heel of his boots. 

“Louis?” 

Louis snapped to attention, nodded and cleared his throat. 

Harry gave Louis a once over. “Givenchy? Impressive.”

Louis stuck out his hand. Harry’s hand engulfed his own when they shook. “Guilty. Full disclosure: this is absolutely as fancy as it gets. Figured if I was going to be captured for all eternity in photos online I might as well splurge, right?” 

Harry let out a loud laugh. “I’m going to try to keep this from getting too awkward, okay? My team’s told them,” he motioned to where the paps were stationed, “to stay as far away as possible. I’m sure you won't be able to totally forget they’re there, but that’s the goal.”

“Okay, sure.” Louis fidgeted with the hem of his shirt, while he quickly looked around for the rest of Harry’s team. “So, Niall? It’s Niall, right?” Harry nodded as Louis continued, “Said we were going to The Ivy?”

“Yeah, have you been?” Harry put a hand on the small of Louis’ back and led him to the black Escalade with tinted windows parked at the sidewalk. Was it possible Harry’s hand almost spanned his back? Even after he pulled his hand away, Louis could feel exactly where they had touched. 

“No, but rumor has it it’s your go-to for a first date. Must be good.”

Louis watched the profile of Harry’s Adam’s apple dip as he swallowed, his mouth downturned slightly. 

“It’s a place to be seen.” Harry turned back to Louis, toothy smile in place. “The food is really good though.” 

There was no one else from Harry’s team. It was just them and the driver in the car. 

Once they were buckled in, the conversation flowed easily. Louis talked about growing up in Doncaster with his large family and Harry listed all the houses he lived in growing up and gushed about his stepbrother’s son. They continued making small talk until the driver pulled up in front of the restaurant. 

Harry was so easy to talk to. There was never a lull in the conversation. So far it was the least awkward date Louis had ever been on. 

Louis was led from the car to the restaurant in a flurry of camera flashes that left ghosting spots in front of his eyes, even as the hostess walked them to their table. Conveniently, the stained glass windows meant the paps stationed outside were just dark blurs. “Now I get why celebrities wear sunglasses at night. Didn’t have a spare pair at home for me?”

Harry barked out a laugh loud enough to have a few tables turn to look at them. “Sorry, you’ll have to work up to that level of fame. Contest winner doesn’t quite have the panache of Oscar winner, does it?” Harry paused. “I’m neither, actually, so you’re a whole step ahead of me.”

Louis laughed at how unaffected Harry was. The man in front of him, biting his lip as he perused the menu, was so different than what Louis had expected. 

There was so much he wanted to ask Harry about all his dates at this restaurant and if any of them were real or if he had as little say in all of this as Louis. He didn’t want to make Harry uncomfortable though, so instead he asked Harry what he’d recommend to eat. 

Louis was amazed at how easy it was to ignore the whole setup once he and Harry started talking again. Harry spoke slowly, pausing briefly between sentences, while discussing what kind of films he’d like to be a part of in the future and how spending so much time in LA was literally worlds away from his life growing up in Holmes Chapel, or when he got to come back to London for extended periods between gigs, for that matter. 

Louis rambled on about his love of football and what it was like playing for the Rover’s youth academy until he was nineteen, how even after he wasn’t signed professionally he couldn’t give up his one true love and moved into coaching. Harry maintained eye contact through the whole discussion and confessed how he loved a good match. He claimed that with his knowledge and understanding of the game, he should play a lot better. Louis laughed at his honesty; the man was funny. They bonded over their favorite players and memorable matches. 

Twice the waitress came by to collect their plates, but Louis wasn’t ready to say goodbye. He held tight to his fork, pushing the uneaten bits of his meal around claiming he was still picking at it. So they kept talking. 

They talked about their music choices and Harry promised to make a playlist for Louis of some more underground, indie music he had come across at small clubs in Los Angeles, and Louis rattled off some bands getting traction in London.

When it came time to pay, Louis convinced Harry to play a trick on the waitress to postpone the end even by just a few minutes. That Harry was willing to momentarily look like less than a media-polished sweetheart for a bit of a laugh was endlessly endearing to Louis.

By the third time she came to pick up the check presenter and payment, neither boy had moved to pay their bill.

Louis gave her a small, embarrassed smile, and then pointedly looked at the folder then back at Harry. Harry acted completely oblivious. Louis turned back to the waitress, holding up one finger, “Sorry, love. Just a mo’.”

He hissed at Harry. “ _You_ invited _me_ on this date.” Louis’ cheeks failed to blush on command, but kept on in spite, acting appropriately embarrassed. “Custom dictates that you should pick up the check. Plus, you’re the one with extra zeros in his bank account.”

“Excuse me? You think just because you think you know me I should cover your dinner? You can’t just use people like that, Louis.”

Louis was ready to hand over an Oscar.

Harry turned back to the waitress with a sickly-sweet smile on his face. “Do you know who I am?”

Her eyes went wide and she took a step back, clearly not used to such a blatant questioning. Her mouth opened and closed, but nothing came out.

“Well, I eat here all the time,” Harry barreled on. “And I’ve never once paid. I don’t even need to carry a wallet. Maybe there’s a tab under my name?”

She opened and closed her mouth again, blinking at them.

Louis started to feel bad.

He let out a little laugh. “We’re just playing a mean joke on you. I’m very sorry.” She focused on Louis, her face now confused instead of scared. “And I take all the blame, honestly, I goaded this one into playing along.” He gently kicked Harry under the table.

Harry pulled out his wallet and slid a credit card into the folio without even looking at the bill. “Bad influence this one is.” He smiled at Louis, then up at the waitress. “Really, I am truly sorry.”

She took the bill and turned to walk away. Louis spoke loudly, “I promise he’ll leave a _very_ well deserved tip.” Then he giggled softly back at Harry. 

▵▵▵

Harry tried to think of a way to extend the date while the waitress ran his card. It was such a good time that he didn’t want it to end. He racked his brain for what to suggest next and kept coming up blank. Normally these stunts were, at best, bearable, so this was all new. He was on an honest to goodness date with a gorgeous man and couldn’t think of a single way to keep his attention after dinner. Well, of course, there was one way, but he didn’t want a quick blowie in the loo. He wasn’t sure Louis was that kind of guy anyway. There certainly hadn’t been any hints that Louis was looking to do anything other than have a meal and a chat. 

Louis apologizing again to the waitress brought Harry’s attention back to the table. While he signed the bill Louis cleared his throat and spoke up, “Hey, so, I’m having a really good time. Um, this is a little awkward. Please say no if you don’t—”

“No, definitely, I mean, this has actually been a lot of fun,” Harry interrupted. 

Louis gave him a small smile. “If your team won’t kill me, maybe we could walk around a bit? Or go get a drink? I mean, anything really. If, I mean, no pressure. I know this isn’t like, a ‘real’ date.”

Harry bit his lip; Louis was unbelievably cute stammering through the proposition. Harry made a show of turning off his phone and stuffing it in his jacket pocket. The paps had all left by the time they walked out, so he informed Raul that they were just taking a little stroll and wouldn’t be too long, but they’d call if they needed anything. 

They continued chatting about anything that popped into their minds, sharing laughs and occasionally brushing knuckles or bumping arms as they walked. Harry hoped he wasn’t coming off as a creeper; he couldn’t keep his eyes off the beautiful man. He had such a gorgeous complexion that at some point Harry needed to start a discussion about his skin routine. Louis had the brightest blue eyes, the tiniest waist which was accentuated by the sharply tailored hoodie and a perfect arse; It was like someone had taken an order for Harry’s perfect man, then rigged the contest.

However, the ‘real’ date comment Louis made at dinner ran through Harry’s head again and again. Maybe Louis just meant in the sense that it was a contrived meeting? But this was most real date Harry had ever had, not that he had anything to compare it to. 

He wouldn’t mind snogging Louis senseless. But, if nothing else, he felt like they could be really good friends. He hadn’t clicked like this with anyone since childhood when he and James inevitably became best friends because they lived three houses down from each other, but he had never wanted to snog James. That one ill-advised game of spin-the-bottle was all the proof he needed. 

As Harry and Louis passed a bookstore, Louis’ eyes lit up and he grasped Harry’s arm tightly. “Oh, actually, do you mind if we stop in here? There’s a book I’m looking for that I can’t find anywhere.” 

They entered the huge, well-lit store that smelled the tiniest bit like dust and mildew. Harry ran his fingers down cracked spines and faded book jackets. Louis walked to the LGBT section, Harry following just a step behind. It felt deliberate, like Louis was asking a question he wasn’t sure Harry wanted to answer. Harry _wasn’t_ sure; what if he read the whole situation wrong? Louis never explicitly said he was gay and though he did win a contest to go on a date with a man, he had also explained that he hadn’t actually entered himself. And coming here was certainly a hint, but maybe also he was just a really involved ally? All of Harry’s sexual experiences started with men dirty dancing against him at private clubs which made it pretty clear if they were interested. Harry wished he had more practice at picking up coded clues.

Louis finally plucked a hardback with a sepia-toned dust jacket off the shelf. “The Naked Civil Servant” was written in red across the top. 

“Oh!” Harry loved that book. He instinctively reached out to touch it. “That’s actually one of my favorites.”

Louis tilted his head as a wrinkle formed between his eyes. “You’ve read it?”

“Yeah, a lot of time on set is spent just sitting around waiting. I tend to read a lot.” Harry gave a small shrug. He hoped he wasn’t coming off as a snob. He tapped the book twice. “It’s… funny-ish, a classic, really. Ten out of ten and would definitely recommend.”

Louis gave Harry a cheeky smile. “Well, I guess now I have to get it. Date two can be a book club meeting.” 

Harry winked in return. It was the perfect time to tell Louis that he was gay, but he chickened out at the last second and the moment disappeared as Louis turned to go check out. 


	4. Chapter 4

Harry woke up disoriented and his first thought was of Louis’ expressive face, his beautiful eyes, and for half a moment before he fully woke up he thought he’d roll over and meet the lips he was drawn to all night. Once his eyes opened to his sparsely decorated London bedroom, he remembered walking Louis up to his building’s door, and wanting desperately to give him a kiss goodnight, before chickening out for the second time that night and planting a quick peck on his cheek instead. 

After Harry said goodbye he registered the sound of cameras and realized that he was so caught up in LouisLouisLouis that he had completely forgotten that paparazzi were there to capture the goodbye hug that he was supposed to give Louis at the end of the night. _Fuck_. His team would have skewered him if he had actually been brave enough to go through with the kiss. Bribing the paps to keep secrets always came with a steep price. He hoped the goodbye came across platonic enough and wondered how the hell he could’ve forgotten they were right down the street. He was a goddamn professional. But then: LouisLouisLouis. 

His phone dinged with a text message before he even had a chance to stretch and get up to wee. Then four more in succession. 

Gems: _get it bro!_  
Mum: _call me when you wake up. I want to hear all about it_  
Nialler: _you broke Tumblr_  
Gems: _he’s hot x_

And the first that had come in, from James, was simply a link to the _Daily Mail_ story that had just been published and a quick _call me this am_

He quickly skimmed the story to see how it was spun. Compared to what he was used to, it was tame. A whole gallery of pictures showed how they met, walked into the restaurant, and then said goodbye. He mentally catalogued a few HQs of Louis that’d he’d want to download later when he’d remember where he had last used his laptop. He was so fucking beautiful. The accompanying story was just a few sentences: highlights of Harry’s career and dating life, and a blurb about the contest and the money that had been raised. Of course they didn’t even mention The Malala Project, as though a moment of research would ruin the crafted release his team had surely written up. It mentioned Louis’ age and that he was from Doncaster, and at the end there was a glib line about a bromance as they looked chummy while eating their meals before sharing a handshake goodbye. 

Nothing earth shattering. 

Next came Tumblr as he started scrolling down his dashboard. There was already picture after picture after picture reblogged from the article, plus some edits were already popping up. He had no idea how his fans were so fast. Most posts were tagged with some variation of _#!!!_ or _#he looks so happy_ or _#harryxmen_ or _#i’m screaming_ and a few were waging a passionate war of Larry Stylinson vs Houis Tomles for an official ship name. The anonymous messages claiming people were forcing a sexuality on the two boys were annoying, but the Big Harries were handling it well, remaining respectful and suggesting they Google the concept of heteronormativity. 

Harry recognized how happy and relaxed he looked. He thought Louis did too. 

Side-by-side contrast posts of his date with Louis versus any other stunt date he had gone on came up often as he refreshed his dash. The difference was striking. How did anyone possibly believe that he was in love with any of those women? 

Of course, a legion of fans would now believe that he was in love with Louis. Which was silly after only one date. Totally ridiculous. But this time, unlike in the past, their reactions made him feel oddly settled instead of on edge. He’d think about that after the series of phone calls he needed to make. 

After dragging himself out of bed and fixing himself his first cup of coffee, he got to calling his mom, then Gemma, and then Niall, recounting in excruciating detail the whole night, almost word for word for the three of them. 

He should’ve just typed it out on their group chat, aptly named Mama A & Kids. 

Yes, he had a good time. (It was the best night out he could remember.) No, he’s not sure if he’ll see Louis again, although he’d like to. He needed to come up with a way to see him again. (Help!) Yes, Louis was in fact _very_ good looking. (Gorgeous. Exquisite. Perfect.) Yay or Nay to texting the morning after? (The yays had it.)

He had to cut his call with Niall short when his phone started blowing up with more text messages, this time a series of expletives and a string of emojis that Harry could not quite decipher but knew spelled out Not Good. He relaunched Tumblr and found himself looking at an extreme close up of the thin white bag Louis held, the cover of the book barely concealed. A few fans took it as clue that Harry was using queer coding to make a statement about himself. They weren’t wrong, necessarily, he _had_ done it before, but this time just happened to be a mistake.

A very big mistake if the intensity of the texts he was receiving from his team were any indication. 

▵▵▵

HarryHarryHarry was a constant loop in Louis’ brain. The non-stop texting since the day after may be to blame. There were definitely some flirty texts, including fighting over who looked better in the _Daily Mail_ photos that were published. And pet names had become a thing with them, trying to out do each other with how sappy they could be. Maybe it wasn't the constant texting, maybe it was Harry himself. 

Maybe it was the knowledge that they had one night of fun and would never see each other again. It wasn’t real. Or maybe the cause of the loop was simply Harry.

Louis’ response to Wenger’s text of a row of question marks was a stark reminder that it wasn’t real. _Oh it was nothing. Just a bit of charity. Not every day you get a meet a movie star, right?_ It wasn’t necessarily a lie, but it still felt like it. 

The teen room was quiet when Louis entered Mosaic the first time after the date. They were all sitting quietly in a half circle, facing one empty chair opposite their arc; an occasional whisper broke the otherwise eerie silence. They just looked right back at him when he stood in the doorway wondering who had kidnapped his kids and replaced them with quiet replicas. 

“Hi,” he said with a tentative wave. The kids were freaking him out. “Guess this seat’s for me?”

Under the banner made from multicolored LGBT flags, the normally overfull bulletin board had been cleaned of the flyers and notices and in their place were an assortment of articles and pictures covering his date with Harry. He tapped a few photos as he walked by. 

“So who wants to start today?” Jordyn’s hand shot up. “Okay, what do you want to discuss today.”

“Your date with Harry.” All the kids were leaning forward, rapt focus on Louis. 

Louis shrugged. “It was nice.” He knew that everyone wanted dirt on celebrities they could pass along, but he didn’t have any. It was already all over the papers. He recognized the look on his own face and he couldn’t do anything to erase it. He couldn’t give any more to anyone who was asking. Not even Liam, who normally had to dissect every second of his dates with him. 

“Come on!” Jordyn moaned. “I know you have more to say. Was he hot?”

“Uh…” Louis laughed. “You’ve seen him. He’s gorgeous.”

“But does he look different in person?”

Louis shook his head. “Sorry to disappoint.”

So it was nice, which is how he explained it to the anxious faces in front of him who all let out a collective groan. They wanted details, what Harry smelled like (fresh, was the best thing Louis could come up with, with a hint of something woody, and his hair smelled brighter, fruitier) and what he wore (the Gucci outfit was explained in detail) and what they talked about (I don’t know, stuff?). But Louis wouldn’t give them anything else. 

Honestly, he wouldn’t give himself more than that. The texts were sure to peter out that evening or the next day and he’d go back to being one of Harry Styles’ many admirers, albeit with a cool story to share at parties, once some time had passed. He hadn’t known what to expect as far as Harry’s personality, but he knew exactly what the parameters of the ‘date’ were.

He had recounted the same lack of details to all his siblings, but if he let himself get carried away a bit when he was just talking to his mum, that was allowed. She saw right through it from the beginning and after his fifth or maybe seventh time stressing how nice it was, she called him out, “You really like him, don’t you?”

“I do, mum,” he whined, “I know it’s silly and irrational, and nothing will come of it, but I can’t help it, it was the best date I can ever remember and now I have a stupid crush on a stupid famous heartthrob.” He was ridiculous. 

▵▵▵

Harry, Gemma, and Niall sat around the kitchen table with the phone on speaker. They listened to some god awful hold music with the occasional recorded woman coming on to say that they’ll “be connected as soon as the leader calls in” which sounded ominous and every single time Niall repeated himself, “Really, Harry should be the leader since they’re all there for him anyway.” 

“It doesn’t matter anyway,” Harry grumbled. They were going to say no again. Ben would offer some bullshit excuse about foreign box office receipts and end the call with ‘we’ll discuss again at a later, unspecified, date. Oh, and by the way, next week you’ll meet your next stunt girlfriend.’ They had gone through this enough times that he didn’t know why at this late hour they couldn’t just send him a text that said no. 

He was never going to get to come out and he was going to die alone. 

Finally they heard a beep that signaled they were connected to the Los Angeles conference room that Harry had grown to hate. “We’ll cut to the chase, we know it’s late there.” 

“Hi, yeah, thanks. How you guys doing?” Harry answered politely but without actually caring what their answers were. He knew it would just be a chorus of fines returned to him. 

Instead there was a lot of rustling and some um and ahs. Finally Ben spoke, “We don’t quite understand this, but your current ratings are through the roof. This promo really worked.” He sounded proud of himself. A stark change from the last time they had spoken and Ben was practically panicked. Harry rolled his eyes at Gemma and Niall sitting awfully close across the table.

“Okay…” Harry questioned. 

James spoke up, loud and clear. “We’re coming up with a plan for you to come out.”

“I’m sorry, what?”

Ben cut back in, “It is dependent on how the public reacts to what we’re planning. Any major shifts in public thinking and we might pull the plug on the whole thing, but after seeing you with Louis in combination with a few of your comments during the last promo season, it wouldn’t be all that shocking.” Harry found it hard to breath through this news. “Plus, it’s happening more and more with less negative reaction, so we don’t anticipate any problems.”

The three of them looked at each other in shock. Harry was actually going to be able to come out. No more stunting with girls just to cover up his sexuality. 

“Mr. Styles?... Mr. Styles?”

Gemma kicked him and Harry jumped. “Sorry, yes, thank you, this is great news, I’m very excited,” he scrambled to say, as if they might change their minds if he didn’t agree fast enough. 

“Great.” The man on the other sounded like he’d rather be anywhere else. Harry could barely tell most of them apart when he was looking at them, over the phone he had no idea who was who. 

Someone else chimed in, “However, there is one other detail.”

“What’s that?” Harry asked. 

“It really polls much better if you have a boyfriend when you come out, if the seeding is done with one other person.”

Harry wasn’t about to ask why. He knew blatant homophobia was thankfully becoming less and less accepted by society, but there was still some work to be done before a single gay celebrity was not automatically assumed to be a slag. 

“Okay, do I at least get to pick who?” LouisLouisLouis. 

The call ended shortly after. Apparently there was a short list, Louis included, of men they had considered and over the next few days they’d choose someone together. 

When they hung up they all let out a whoop of excitement, leaping out of their chairs to hug each other in a circle. Harry may have teared up a bit, so excited at the proposition of finally getting to be a little more himself to the public. Gemma couldn’t stop telling him how proud of him he was, Niall just kept squeezing him with possibly the biggest smile he had ever seen on his face. 

“This calls for a drink,” Niall finally said, pulling away from the hug. “I think there’s a bottle of champagne in the fridge.”

“Proper celebration then,” Gemma added. “Let me help you in the kitchen.”

Harry side-eyed them as they left. That was definitely not a two person job.

▵▵▵

Harry found himself attached to his phone, waiting for every one of Louis’ texts. Harry could send him the silly puns and jokes he made up when Niall had enough corniness or Gemma was out living her own life. Louis’ trove of jokes was as large as Harry’s. It was nice just to share his day, like what was on the telly or what was for tea, and to get a glimpse into Louis’. It had been so long since he had a ‘normal’ life and he liked seeing what could have been. 

So far Louis had passed all of Harry’s leak tests. No embarrassing stories he shared had been published, no travel details given to fans, no vague rumors had gotten out. He was mostly sure that he could trust Louis. As much as he could given the circumstances at least. 

Before he asked Louis if he wanted to help him come out to the public, he had to come out to Louis. 

There was no reason to be terrified, other than he might have completely misread the situation between them and also the whole if this goes south then there’s a possibility of being publicly outed while losing the first friend he’s made in ages thing. Harry’s armpits were damp and he was stuck in a loop: pick up his phone, check social media, put it down, flip through a cookbook, pick phone up, check social media, see if there was anything interesting to watch. He finally gave himself a deadline; if he didn’t gain the courage by six o’clock, he’d give up Louis altogether. 

With two minutes to spare, he sent _can we talk?_

 _sure babe. wrapping up practice. 15min?_ The response was quick, like always. 

Harry wasn’t expecting Louis to actually call him just a few minutes later. He took a deep breath before he answered the phone. Okay, he could do this. 

“Hey, Lou! How was practice?” Totally fine. His voice didn’t shake at all. 

“Eh. Not that great to be honest. I’m not sure how we’re going to do against Leicester. And my top striker was just called up to the Under 18s.” There was lot of commotion echoing in the background. 

“If now’s not a good time, we can talk later.”

“No, this is great.” A door slammed in the background and suddenly it was only Louis with no distractions across the line. “Need to get my mind off things for a bit. So what’s up?”

Straight to the point then. “Um,” Harry stalled. 

“Hey, I have another joke for you. A man walks into a zoo. The only animal there is a dog. It’s a shitzhu.”

Harry groaned. “That’s a shit joke.” He laughed despite himself. 

“Yeah, you’re right. But I can hear your smile now.”

Louis was kind of the best. 

“So I have something to tell you.” Harry’s back ached with tension. He sat ramrod straight and took another breath. 

“I’m listening.”

“Um, right. So the thing I need to say… that I want to tell you… is that I’m gay.” The phone shook in his hand. He was definitely going to throw up. Louis needed to respond immediately or he was going to hang up.

“Great! Just so we’re clear, I am too.”

Harry’s whole body relaxed back into the sofa. So he wasn’t awful at figuring this stuff out. Louis was also gay. They had gone on a date and were still talking and they were both definitely gay and Harry sent up a silent ‘thank you’ to whatever deity was looking out for him. 

“Sorry, is this new? Do you need to talk about it?”

Huh? “What? No. I’m fine. Really, super fine. This is great. Really great.”

Louis sounded confused. “Oh, cool. Just with the silence I wasn’t sure. Normally people don’t come out to me over the phone so I was missing the whole body language thing. Sometimes it’s like, a big thing to say it, you know.”

“Right, of course, yeah. No, years ago I did. I mean, everyone I’m closest to knows, it’s just, like, still publicly in the closet.”

“I promise I won’t say a word.” Louis’ sincerity brought a smile to Harry’s face. 

Harry’s body tensed again when he remembered that was just information he needed to get out before asking Louis for a huge favor. “Actually, my team is letting me come out...”

Louis let out a whoop of excitement. “Are you serious? That’s amazing! I’m sure you’re going to help so many kids.”

“And… they want me to come out with a boyfriend. They say it looks better. Apparently jobs are only available if I like one penis, but not if there’s a potential for lots of cocksucking.” Louis cackled at the sad truth, which Harry appreciated. “So, I need a public boyfriend. I was hoping you’d say yes?”

Harry heard Louis suck in a deep breath. “What?”

“There’s all these people who specialize in stats and PR and swaying public opinion and all sort of shit that has nothing to do with what I actually do, but they say that people rate us highly.” Harry let out a nervous laugh. “My date with you is the most well-polled stunt the team has ever pulled. They want it to be you.” 

“They want what to be me?”

“My boyfriend?” Harry squeaked. 

▵▵▵

Louis’ brow furrowed. “What do _you_ want?” 

“Well… I like you. I don’t, I mean…” Harry stammered, “We’ve had a single date. It’s a little forward to ask you to be my boyfriend. But this has been nice right? You’re nice? This feels…” 

“Nice?” Louis joked. Of course this would happen to him. 

“Yeah, but maybe we can go on more dates? Like still get to know each other better, but the message out to the public is a little more serious?”

Louis found it hard to draw in a full breath. “I don’t know…” Wagner would surely kill him. Would he even be allowed under _his_ contract? 

“The thing is that I’d really like to keep this, us, private us, from my team too, maybe, if it’s possible. Like they would think we were just stunt. My team, they mean well, but my happiness isn’t always a factor, you know.”

“And this would make you happy?”

There was a long pause and finally Harry said, “You make me happy.”

Louis’ stomach swooped and his cheeks flushed. Harry was too much. Louis was glad that this was happening over the phone; it would’ve been _way_ too much in person. “Stop, you’re making me blush.” His face heated up again when it came out more fond than he intended. 

“I just want this thing to be for us a little longer. For as long as you’ll have me actually. But they’ll all be coming at it from a business angle and if you agree to do this, it’s important to me that you don’t feel like it’s a business transaction.” 

“You don’t want to feel out—whatever this is—in private, then maybe announce it later?” Louis’ heart pounded at the possibility. They had only seen each other once. This whole thing was a lot to take in. “We’ve only been on one pseudo-date… Are you sure?” There must be a million guys out there would be better suited to help Harry through this.

“There is no one else I’d rather do this with.” Louis actually believed him. He trusted so few men, and yet there was _something_ about Harry.

“And also,” Harry continued, “I know the timing’s not great, but I’ve been asking for years, so if they’re finally saying yes… I have to take my chance while I have it.”

Louis would be coming out publicly too. His entire extended family, everyone he had played with and coached through the years would know. It was terrifying and freeing all at once. “Are you scared?”

“Not really? I mean, it sucks coming out to people over and over again, or it did until I was shoved back in the closet. But there’s a sadistic part of me that feels like ripping off a band aid and just having the world know will be so much easier than tip-toeing around, always worrying that my private relationships will be leaked.” 

“What can I expect?” Louis asked.

“You can expect me to woo the fuck out of you.” Harry’s reply was playful.

Louis sucked in a deep breath. He ached with the hope that Harry was serious. He cleared his throat. “I meant from your team.”

“Oh… right, of course. Yes… Well, in that case fifteen-minute pap walks for frozen yogurt? It’ll be reported that we struck up a friendship. After a few weeks, photos will be staged so we’re holding hands, maybe a dinner date, and stories with some queer coded language will start saying we’re close friends and hopefully some rumors will start. After three or four months the media will be saying that we’re together, maybe some staged kissing pictures will accompany the story, and then it normally fizzles out after a few more months with some bullshit breakup story.”

“Right, the breakup…” Louis recoiled at the thought. “How does that work? Like, is one of us going to have to be the bad guy? I, um, have an image clause too, so that’ll need to be worked out. Not that you should have to take the blame…” _Fuck_ , what if they broke up for real before the contract ran out. This was a terrible, terrible idea. “And in general, I guess, I can’t be portrayed badly, because the team…”

“We can hash that all out. It won’t be a problem.” Harry imitated a news anchor, “They still remain good friends. With their schedules it was hard to find time together.” His voice slipped back to normal. “Some generic excuse where neither of us is a bad guy. And you’ll get paid.” The last sentence was rushed out. 

Louis hated Harry’s flat tone, like it was common to expect people to be paid to hang out with him. “Bullshit. I’m not accepting your money for this.”

“Oh! I mean, I think you kind of have to, like I said, to them it’s a business transaction.”

"Ugh, it still feels skeezy. But I guess I can donate it somewhere anonymously." Like Mosaic. Louis started imagining all they could do with some extra money.

“So, is that a yes?” Harry said.

"Before I fake date you, I have some serious questions. Are you a Tory?”

Harry let out a laugh. “That is a serious question. No. I’m not. You?”

“Don’t insult me like that, of course not. Next, you don’t kick puppies in your spare time, do you? I simply won’t allow it.”

“Ouch! Now who’s doing the insulting? In fact, I’ve been known to foster kittens when they’re too young to be in a shelter, like before they get all their vaccinations.”

Of course. Harry was turning out to be a proper saint. “Fine, movie star, gold star for that one. It’s a good thing I’m not allergic.”

Louis took another deep breath. This was by far the most complicated thing that Louis had ever gotten himself into, and he still wasn’t exactly sure how fake and real dating the same person at the same time would work. But he couldn’t believe that this beautiful, beautiful man wanted to see him again, so he wasn’t going to let Harry slip through his fingers. “Fine, if I get team approval, I’ll fake date you.”

“Do you have any questions before real dating me?”

“No, that’s what dating is for. Now, when are you taking me out again?”

▵▵▵

The sun shone bright in the sky and Louis regretted not putting on a layer of sun crème before going out for a kick around with Liam. He hoped if he got burned it would at least turn into a deep tan before he had to get papped with Harry in a few days. 

The park started to get crowded with blankets spread around the perimeter of the makeshift pitch and he wondered idly if it was too early to crack open one of the beers they had planned to drink that afternoon while lazing about. He had to volunteer a few hours that night at Mosaic, and figure out how to solve the interrelationship problems on the footie team while also planning how to beat Tottenham in the match the upcoming week. 

Mostly he wanted to turn his brain off so he would stop thinking about Harry. He couldn’t get that tousled hair and lean body out of his head. And the texts weren’t helping. They came all day, at all hours, and Louis’ heart raced every time he looked down to see a notification or four. Never mind the fear of double texting, Harry sent them until Louis picked up his phone and typed out his responses. 

He would normally feel like someone was coming on too strong, but Louis wanted it. He craved every lame joke, every minor complaint about lines at Tesco, and every observation of the world that Harry sent his way. 

Louis responded in kind, and also sent along plenty of selfies. He promised Harry one of him in the park while he spent his day out in the sun. 

Louis considered sending a picture of his thighs as well. He was wearing his favorite red Arsenal training shorts that might be considered a tad too short, but they did exceptional things to his legs. 

He didn’t have doubts about Harry. He liked Harry. He liked Harry a lot. He liked Harry so much more than he expected to when he won that silly contest. 

But everything else... it was a lot of pressure to be publicly dating to someone you were starting to date privately. And he couldn’t turn off his brain. What if the fans didn’t approve? He saw the scathing reviews of Harry’s beards. He knew he shouldn’t read the comments, but he also knew he wasn’t going to be able to help himself. What if Harry went through with this and his career tanked? He was putting a lot of pressure on himself for this stunt to succeed for Harry’s sake. 

“Liam,” Louis whined, “I think this is a terrible idea. Do you think it’s too late to back out?”

Liam stopped the football with his foot and did a keepie-uppie, before answering, “It is a terrible idea. There is no way you are getting out of this without your pride or heart bruised.” He passed the ball back to Louis. “But all of your agents approved it for some reason, and then you signed, so yeah, it’s a little late to back out.” Louis was supposed to be the practical one and Liam was supposed to be nothing but supportive. Maybe he could swap Liam out for Luke as best friend.

Louis set up the ball, took a few steps, and then sailed a perfectly executed top bin right over Liam’s head. “Did you see that?” Louis covered his mouth to try and play down the excitement of the perfect kick that Liam, of course, missed. 

“I know he seems like a gentleman. But you literally know almost nothing about him.” Liam scoped out the crowds in the park distractedly. 

Louis grit his teeth. “I knew nothing about Zayn when you tried to set me up with him. The prospect of me dating a stranger didn’t bother you then.”

Liam snapped his head around and gave Louis a scathing look, “And look how that ended.”

“I’m just saying I know about the same amount about Harry as I would from a Tinder date, or if you tried to set me up with another friend.” He ran to get the ball from the corner of the net and threw it overhand to Liam. “It’s not him I’m worried about, it’s everything else.”

“Your dates will be broadcasted to the world, I can’t imagine how that would be awkward at all,” Liam responded dryly. 

“It’s going to take me forever to plan my outfits. There’s going to be so many pictures of me.” Louis threw himself on the ground, starfishing on the pitch and squinting at the bright sky. “You know I can’t control my face when I like someone. He’s going to see my stupid squinty smile in all the papers and know how much I like him. There will be nowhere to hide.” 

Hand on a popped hip, Liam stood above him casting a shadow across Louis’ face. “Plus, he is an actor. Who knows if anything he says is true. I bet everyone in Hollywood is so fake.”

Maybe he should doubt Harry.

“Hey,” Liam softened, “If you’re just honest with him, what’s the worst that can happen? So he knows you like him… who cares? He seems to like you.”

Louis thought that over for a few minutes. “I am contractually obligated to like him. And I...” he faltered as he thought about how much he wanted to bare his heart, then went for it, he’d end up telling Liam everything anyway eventually. 

“It’s beyond stupid, but I’m already in too deep. When he walks away I know I’ll be heartbroken, so I suppose it doesn’t matter whether or not he knows how much I like him.”

Liam let out a low whistle and rolled his eyes. “That’s the spirit.” Liam gave him a gentle kick in the thigh.

“Hey, careful of the legs.” Louis kicked the ball Liam was sat on and Liam hit the ground with an thump. 

Liam gave a smile anyway. “Could work on the positivity a bit, but you’ll manage just fine.”

“And you’ll be there with ice cream and action movies when this all goes south, right?” The thought sent a little knife into Louis stomach. He was so screwed. 

Liam scoffed and threw an arm around Louis’ shoulder. Liam could retain his best friend status for now. 


	5. Chapter 5

The next date Harry’s team set up started at Starbucks. Louis would’ve chosen almost anywhere else since he didn’t drink coffee and their tea was shit, but he knew his opinion didn’t count, so he just parroted back the date and time and told Niall he’d be there. At this rate, he and Niall were going to end up as close friends with the amount they talked. Niall was in charge of the fake dates, and was kind enough, but Louis enjoyed planning the real follow-up date with Harry more. In fact, Louis had to hold back a laugh as Niall explained everything to him, since Harry had already clued him in, right down to Niall’s exact phrasing. 

Louis arrived at the Starbucks a few minutes early, but luckily Harry did as well, if the giant SUV parked out front was an indication. Harry opened the door with a huge grin, but instead of getting out, he motioned for Louis to get in. 

“Really?” Louis slid into to the backseat next to Harry. 

He had been debating on the whole trip there whether or not to go for a hello hug. Awkwardly sitting side by side in the car made that decision clear. But, despite their positions, Harry threw an arm around him anyway in a half hug and squeezed his shoulder. Harry’s security guard, Raul, was driving, and Niall sat in the front seat. They both offered hellos. 

Harry took Louis’ hand in his. It was warm and comforting and Harry’s thumb stroking the back of his hand was oddly soothing as Harry explained the day ahead. “We have to get out of the same car. Paps are going to get pictures of us leaving the car, then getting coffee. I might do some fan service if anyone was given the heads up that we’ll be in there, then we’ll come back to the car. We’re not supposed to touch. And then on to the next location.” Okay, this was happening. 

They switched seats; Harry and his gazelle-like legs climbed over Louis as Louis ducked and swerved to avoid flailing limbs. He did get a chance to ogle Harry’s ass as it passed inches from his face, he refrained from sticking his neck out and biting at the black denim. 

After they were situated, Louis took a second to memorize the setup. Once the paparazzi had fanned out on the sidewalk to get their shots, Harry opened the car door. 

“Lights, Camera, Action!” Louis only half joked as he climbed out after Harry.

There were a handful of fans inside and they all eyed Louis while simultaneously edging him away from Harry. He tried not to be annoyed at how pushy they were. Harry looked okay with it, so he wouldn't be bothered on his behalf. They executed the plan perfectly, even managing to both get in one of the fans’ Snapchat as they waited for their drinks to be made.

They left the Starbucks to a chorus of young women yelling “Bye, Harry!” and camera flashes going off in front of them. Louis’ eyes swam with a kaleidoscope of colors as he tried to blink away the bright lights. 

Raul pulled away from the curb once the paparazzi had time to get in their vehicles. The paps followed in close pursuit, and parked next to them at the mini-golf car park.

Niall hopped out to let the owners know that they had arrived. He made sure everything was still okay since the last time they had talked to clear the location. 

“Am I allowed to touch you now?” Louis joked. 

Harry’s face pulled into a tight grimace. “Nope.” The look slid off his face and was replaced by a genuine smile. “Must keep our balls and clubs to ourselves.” 

Louis gave his arm a soft punch in the privacy of the car, and Harry slouched into the touch. “You have a dirty mind, Styles.”

“Glad you can keep up with me.”

“Keep up with you? Clearly you have not seen my competitive streak. Lucky for you, you’re about to learn what it feels like to be beat by The Louis Tomlinson.”

“I mean, if that’s on the table…”

“Not on a second date it’s not!” Louis squawked. They both let out a laugh at that, until Niall came back to let them know they were free to go in. He and Raul were going to stay back in the car, but they were a text away should Louis and Harry need any help.

“What kind of help could we possibly need?” Louis muttered as they made their way into the clubhouse. 

“Swarming fans mostly.” Harry shrugged. “The paps will stay back, but they’ll draw attention, so…” Louis really hoped that wouldn’t be an issue. A wave here or there would be fine, but he actually wanted a chance to get to know Harry better, even if they were on the fake portion of the date, and screaming fans would definitely put a damper on things.

Their round of mini-golf turned out to be uneventful, except that Louis did show Harry that he was an exceptionally bad loser, pouting the whole way to the frozen yogurt place after he lost by two strokes. Not even a series of innuendos about beating and strokes could crack open a smile. 

Finally Harry broke him with a joke about getting it in the hole and he lit up with a groan. “You’re incorrigible, Styles.”

They left the paps outside, though they’d probably be shooting them through the plate glass windows of the fro-yo store. Louis ducked under Harry’s arm as he held the door open. Harry’s hand ghosted over the small of his back as Louis passed but Harry jerked it away quickly. “Get as many toppings as you want, it’s on me,” Harry wiggled his eyebrows and Louis knew he should laugh, but all that truly registered was Harry’s breath on his ear and the line of goosebumps that followed. 

The teens working behind the counter all turned an alarming shade of red, boys and girls alike, when they saw who was coming in. Standing in front of the self-serve handles, Louis gave him a small elbow to the ribs, “Shouldn’t get too many toppings; I thought we were having dinner after this.” 

He worried that counted as touching and concentrated all his energy on keeping his eyes on the selections in front of him. When he saw Mint Chocolate Chip he relaxed slightly, it was his favorite and he couldn’t focus enough to remember the other flavors in front of him. Harry was next to him, close enough that he could theoretically wrap an arm around his waist. He kept his arms firmly glued to his sides. 

They helped themselves to small swirls of yogurt before walking over to the toppings bar. “Yeah, dessert before dinner might not have been the best plan, but I did really want to cook for you.” Harry’s voice was barely a whisper. Louis managed to add a spoonful of chocolate sprinkles before the goosebumps reappeared on the exposed skin of his neck. 

He bit his lip and purposefully walked over to the cashier, forgoing whatever other toppings were laid out. He needed a bit of space. “I’ll be sure to save some room.”

Louis’ mind cleared with a bit of distance. The paps were a great excuse to not get too close again. The annoying clicking of shutters as they left were the last of it for the day; the paps wouldn’t be following them any further. It was time for their real date, away from prying eyes. 

▵▵▵

Walking into Harry’s penthouse flat, Louis’ phone was already lighting up with texts from friends who were curious to find that he had gone out, again, with Harry.

"Wow, that story didn't take long to be published."

"Before the private date, how convenient."

Louis was so distracted by his phone that he almost missed the gorgeous decor. The building was ultra modern, and almost entirely glass, but the interior was soft and homey, plush couches and colorful artwork, instead of the black and chrome he normally associated with the modern buildings. 

Louis was surprised to find that tea was almost ready to eat. The lasagna just needed to be warmed in the oven along with the garlic bread. Louis got out a bottle of wine and uncorked it, pouring two generous glasses for them, then hopped up on the counter while Harry made a side salad. 

“Looks like you have a real talent for that,” Louis prodded. 

Harry looked up confused, “Salads?”

“Salad tossing.” Louis stuck out his tongue and crossed his eyes. 

Harry broke into laughter. “I’d quite like to prove it to you, actually.” 

“Ha! I don’t give up my assets to just anyone.” Louis picked out a chunk of carrot from the salad and tossed it at Harry’s face. While tossing a few more chunks of vegetables at each other, they were laughing so hard that, with tears in their eyes, Harry ended up knocking his glass of wine off the counter. It splashed all over Louis’ trousers and they started laughing again when Louis made another joke, “If you wanted me to take them off all you had to do was ask.”

Eventually they got themselves sorted and Louis was mostly dry after patting a tea towel to his thighs. The timer dinged and Louis helped Harry carry everything over to set table. 

“Are you on Twitter?” Harry asked out of nowhere as they were nearing the end of their meals. 

“Yep, Twitter, Insta, Snapchat, Tumblr. With a little digging you can probably easily find me anywhere.” Louis tried to remember if he was forgetting anything, “There’s gotta be a long forgotten MySpace page out there. Maybe a Xanga that I couldn’t even help you find at this point. Why?”

“Do you mind if I follow you?”

Louis shrugged, “Just a bunch of shit tweets if I’m being honest, but yeah, that’s fine.”

Harry hesitated before saying, “I know this is a pain, but I’d suggest, like, going private first, maybe turn off all your notifications? Some of my fans can get a little… investigative?”

“Already on private since I’m always surrounded by impressionable teens. They don’t need to see my drunken tweets when I’ve had a bit too much. And I’ve got five little sisters, so the whole privacy thing never really existed in my life. Your fans don’t scare me, Styles.” He puffed out his chest in a show of bravado, then immediately spilled sauce all down his front, as a bite slid off his fork. 

Between the mess they created and the expected dry cleaning bill, the date should’ve been a disaster. Instead, they extended it when they decided to watch _Grease_. 

They started on opposite ends of the sofa, feet tangled in the middle, but after a tickle battle, Louis ended up more or less tucked under Harry’s arm. He realized that this was a particularly comfortable spot, cuddled close to Harry. He only got up once to use the loo, potentially a record since he constantly fidgeted, especially around cute guys he was interested in. He dancing his way backwards, and admitted to Harry that he knew all the moves since it was once a dream of his to play Danny Zuko on stage. 

In the washroom, Louis shamelessly snooped through all of Harry’s bathroom products until he found a travel sized mouthwash under the sink. 

He came back and tucked himself back under Harry’s arm, breathing on him to confess what he had stolen. “Looking to get lucky later?” Harry joked. 

“Yep. Want to kiss you.” Louis seriously answered before turning back to the movie. Harry wasn’t even close to smooth when he extricated himself from Louis’ grasp to head to the washroom himself. 

By the time the movie ended they were both singing and dancing along to “You’re the One That I Want.” Louis couldn’t believe that Harry Styles was such a dork and this was how he was choosing to spend his night. Louis loved how unabashed he was, both of them going all out with their moves until Harry pulled him in to spin him around, then dip him in his arms. 

Louis was about to make a joke about not dropping precious cargo when he saw Harry focused on his face, his eyes flicking between Louis’ eyes and lips. Louis pulled his arms around Harry’s waist and took half a step forward. Harry met him halfway and pressed his lips to Louis’. 

Harry’s lips were soft and definitely tasted like honeydew. Harry pulled him in tighter, one hand coming up to cup Louis’ head, his thumb running gently along Louis’ jawline. There wasn’t a searing heat to the kiss, but Louis couldn’t get enough, drawing in Harry’s tongue and taking his time mapping out what sounds he could elicit when he rolled his tongue a certain way or nipped at Harry’s lower lip. 

Harry was so responsive, clutching at Louis as they explored each other. They made out through the end of the movie, only pulling away once the Blu-Ray menu kept repeating the same few bars of music. 

Harry ducked in for another quick peck of Louis’ lips. “Mmmm, wanna take this to the bedroom?” 

Louis thought for a moment. “I do, but… I should actually get going.”

Harry’s face fell a bit, “You sure?”

“What’s the rush? Good things come to those who wait.” It was a corny line that Louis often used, but this time it didn’t feel like a lie. 

Harry bit his red, swollen lips. “I’ve waited twenty-one years for someone like you. I don’t mind waiting until you’re ready.”

Louis knew it wasn’t the wine and kisses that heated his cheeks. He had never met someone like Harry. 

▵▵▵

Louis traveled back to Doncaster the following morning since he had the Saturday off from practices. He tried and failed the whole train ride to get Harry and their lovely date out of his mind. When he walked into his mum’s bustling house, he was finally distracted. He was greeted by his mum; his stepdad Dan; the eldest younger sisters, Lottie and Fizzy; and two sets of twins. He was meeting Lottie and Fizzy’s newest boyfriend and girlfriend, respectively, for the first time which added the slightest layer of tension to the whole day, until Louis saw how great Tommy was with the babies and how Kat was showing the older twins some contouring tricks. 

Most of his family had moved to the garden and prepared for the cookout while the babies rode around in toy cars. Louis tried to get a some football organized, but everyone except Kat actively ignored him and focused on their phones when he came around so they could avoid his intense competitive streak.

“Wait, Lou, why is the _Daily Mail_ writing about you?” Fizzy looked up from her phone with confusion written all over her face. “You went on another date with Harry?”

After the first date he had FaceTimed with the whole family so they could hear all about it and ask all the questions they had about Harry at once. He had stressed that Harry was a very nice guy but it was all very platonic and since he was so busy he doubted that he’d ever see him again. He waved off all suggestions that it looked like Harry wanted to eat him alive in the published photos and claimed it was just because Harry was an intense bloke. All of that was true at the time, and he had avoided telling anyone but his mom that they were still talking.

He’d never tell his whole family about a guy he had just gone on a second date with, it was way too early for that kind of pressure. And it never lasted much longer either. He didn’t know how to explain to his family, he hated lying to them, but it still felt too new to tell them the whole truth. Plus, the non-disclosure penalties were pretty severe. 

“Yeah, we, uh,” Louis cleared his throat, “we went out again yesterday. Just a bit of coffee and mini-golf.”

“Thought you weren’t going to see him again?” Lottie read the article over Fizzy’s shoulder. 

“I wasn’t planning on it, but he called so…” Louis lifted his shoulders in a half-hearted shrug he hoped they’d read as nonchalance. 

Fizzy followed up, “So you’re friends now?” 

“I guess?” He didn’t know how to tell them to expect more pictures. “You know we got on during that contest. We just, I dunno, hung out again.”

Jay put the hamburgers that were ready to grill down and lost all pretenses that she was not eavesdropping. He shot her a ‘save me’ look which she just ignored. 

“But why is it in the _Daily Mail_?” Once Tommy joined in, it officially felt like an inquisition. 

“Dunno. I guess we were in the wrong place at the wrong time and the paparazzi caught us.” He winced as he lied through his teeth. He really hated lying to his sisters. 

Lottie shot him a shrewd look, “Seems suspicious that you’d be found there. Not exactly a celeb hangout.”

Tommy backed up Lottie, “Paps are called by the celebrities though.”

Louis was pretty sure that the inner workings of the stunt was well covered in the NDA, so he just didn’t respond to that particular point and instead repeated, “We’re friends, I guess.”

Lottie raised a perfectly groomed eyebrow. “You guess?”

“I just met the guy. Do you want me to say we’re going to get married and have a million babies?”

Jay let out a snort at that. “You’ve wanted to marry him and have a million babies since you first saw him in _Blue Water_. The poster is still on the inside of your closet here.”

If that wasn’t symbolism, Louis didn’t know what was. But, it was a good reminder to take it down, even though Harry probably would never make the trip. Louis fixed the fringe falling across his forehead and he pointedly changed the subject instead, asking about some Rover’s prospects, which suddenly quieted everyone around him. 

That night, Jay sat with Louis in the kitchen over a cup of Yorkshire tea before he had to get the train back to London. She looked over her cup at Louis, her face showing a hint of worry. “Is he worth it?” 

He knew better than to try and deceive his mum. She always saw through him, the one downfall of having his mum as his best friend. “I think he might be. It’s too early, really, two dates and some texts.” He brought the hot mug to his lips and after a long sip continued, “He’s really nice. And funny. I feel like me around him. I know that sounds stupid, but the way I am back here, my most relaxed self, that’s how I feel around him too.”

Jay took his hands in hers. “I’m glad sweetie, I really am. You have this glow when talking about him.” The wrinkle between her eyes appeared as she continued, “But, his life is surely different than yours and I worry.” Louis finally confessed that Lottie and Tommy had it right, that it was all planned, and she should be prepared to see more of him in the gossip rags. 

The smile dropped right off her face. He explained that Harry was using him as a means to come out, but her frown remained. 

“I know you’d help anyone Boo, but are you sure you’ve thought this through?”

“I’m already training myself not to look at the comments, or the stories at all actually. Since whatever they write isn’t true anyway.”

He made her promise not to read them either, to try and stop the whole family if she could. He knew how protective his siblings were of each other and he didn’t want them to take it personally if anonymous arseholes decided to voice their opinions.

Louis also knew his mom could read something else there, and that she knew it was already too late, but he still wasn’t ready to say out loud that Harry was actually the best person he had met in a long, long time.

▵▵▵

On the train ride back to London Louis received a phone call from Harry. He was greeted with a joke. “What do you call a solid gold banana?”

“Hi Harry! I’m good. How are you?”

Harry let out a gleeful laugh. “Come on, Lou! What do you call a solid gold banana?”

Louis had no idea. “I give up.”

“A bunch of money!” Harry cackled again, loud enough that Louis had to pull the phone away from his ear. 

“Alright then. Glad you’re having a fun night.”

“I am having a super fun night!” By Harry’s slurring Louis could guess what was coming next. “I’m drinking with Niall.”

It was Louis’ turn to laugh, “Niall the Irishman who can drink anyone under the table? You guys having a party?”

“No. I mean, yes. That Niall. But not a party. Just us. It’s always just us. Unless Gems is around. I’ve been trying to get Niall and Gemma to date, did you know that? Someone should be happy. I’m hiding in my room so they’re alone on the sofa.”

There was a lot to unpack there, a lot that probably should not be discussed while Harry was off his face. Louis ignored it all, “Was just in Doncaster to see the family. I’m heading back to London now.”

“Do you like to travel?”

That seemed like a safe enough direction for the conversation to go. “Sure, yeah, for football we travel a lot so I’m pretty used to it.”

“Oh good. That is good news. I want you to come to LA with me.”

Oh, okay then. “Hazza, I don’t know if—“

Harry plowed ahead, talking over Louis. “I’m going to an amFAR event and I want to bring a date. You. I want you to be my date. I hate red carpets, I really do. But you’ll make it better. I want to send a check but they said I needed to go.”

It was way too soon to be traveling internationally together. He should definitely say no, unless it was one of the vague events that were listed in the contract. “Oh, I don’t know, maybe we should—”

talk about it when you’re sober, but Harry cut in again. “You can say no. It’s okay. You’re probably busy anyway. Not sure Ben would allow it. Forget it. Forget I said anything. Gemma’ll be there, she can come with.”

Louis hated hearing Harry so sad and full of doubt, hated it enough that he thought about just saying yes and dealing with the consequences later. “I’m not… Hazza, I’m not saying no. I think maybe we should talk about it later. It’s late, yeah.”

“Okay. As long as you’re not mad at me. Are you mad at me?”

“Not mad at you at all.”

Louis heard a small crash. “I’m in bed now. Wish you were here.” 

“In your bed?” Louis cringed at the high octave of his voice. 

“Mhmmm. What would you do if you were here?”

The guy was determined, Louis would give him that. “If I was there I’d give you a glass of water then go sleep on the sofa. Now I have a very important question for you. Do you have any more terrible banana jokes?”

“Only have brilliant banana jokes.”

They’d have to agree to disagree on the terrible or brilliant part, but he did have a plethora of jokes. Enough to keep Louis occupied on the rest of the trip into London. 


	6. Chapter 6

Los Angeles was everything Louis imagined. The weather was perfect. The traffic was terrible. The suite at the Sunset Marquis, where Harry’s team had booked his room, was gorgeous. And the excitement of being surrounded by the California landscape outweighed his jet lag.

Louis texted Liam from the hotel closet. _need your help_

_im asleep arsehole_

Louis sent three separate pictures of outfits laid out on the bed. _what should i wear_

_they all look good_

_Obviously !! I do know how to dress myself_ He looked over the three choices that were varying degrees of casual to more dressed up. _now help. shopping & fro-yo. if i never see yogurt after this i’ll be a happy man. what if i was lactose intolerant? _

_still asleep. #2_ Liam chose the black skinny jeans and a black sparkle All Saints t-shirt under a blazer. 

_but then dinner after. what if i need to go fancier ??_ Harry wouldn’t tell Louis where they were eating for their real date. 

_no1 will turn you away if you’re with Harry_

_obvi. still don’t want to embarrass myself._ It was like Liam hadn’t coached him through date-wear for the past five years. 

_whatever. 3 then. 1 is too fancy for shopping. fans will mock u_

Louis fingered the black Maison Margiela jumper with the blue contrast at the bottom. _dark jeans or trousers ??_

_will i ever sleep again? trousers bc you’d rather be overdressed._

He loved Liam. _thanks lima !! now go sleep._

▵▵▵

The restaurant where Louis and Harry dined had a strict no phone policy. It was surprisingly nice, once Louis got over the initial panic of not being able to access his phone whenever he wanted. The candlelight flickered in the middle of the table and after their first glasses of wine they were playing with each other’s fingers across the table. Without any distractions they were able to focus only on each other.

Their bubble burst when Louis’ phone started blowing up as soon as he turned it back on as they pulled up to Harry’s LA house. He regretted it immediately. It was a mess of outraged text messages from his sisters and Liam, and a _we know it’s not true, love you always_ message from his mom. 

The photos from earlier—the shopping portion of their fake date—had been released. And all of Harry’s fans were out to get him. 

Harry’s fans who believed he was gay, or at least, not totally straight, were also upset that Louis was still in the picture, claiming he was a fame whore and was using Harry. The faux dates had been used so many times that they saw straight through them and after side-by-side comparisons of Louis and other stunt girlfriends, they assumed that this was just a set up by his team. They weren’t wrong of course, but they were cruel about it, claiming he looked bored and smug as they walked around Rodeo Drive. 

And that he was just using Harry’s seeding as a way to get famous. 

The homophobia was rampant in one section of his fandom, which was nothing new. Apparently they were very much on the defensive, trying to prove that Louis was straight, which was laughable in the best of circumstances, but insulting when he was out on a date, even a public stunting date, with another man. Who says a footie coach can’t be gay? They were actively ignoring the side-by-sides. 

And everyone universally hated his outfit. Which was, well, upsetting, since he had left thinking he looked good and now was second guessing himself. He couldn’t help but wonder if Harry hated it too. Had he lied when he claimed that Louis looked good when he picked him up?

Louis felt like a pile of rocks were churning in his stomach and Harry caught on immediately, asking him what was wrong. Louis handed his phone over without a word, so Harry could scroll through the screenshots his irate family had sent. So much for the media ban he had imposed on them. Harry was disturbingly quiet as he looked them over, then handed the phone back with a deep sigh. 

After dropping their things off, they headed straight for the spacious deck that overlooked the city. Harry offered Louis a cigarette and they both smoked in silence for several minutes.

Harry was the first to break the silence, his face pale. “I’m not going to tell you how to feel. I know that won’t help.” Louis had never seen him so resigned. “All I can say is that, honestly, you and I both know none of this is true.”

Louis was still not sure what he wanted to say, how to address the mix of emotions coursing through him, so he just nodded. 

Harry’s green eyes bore into Louis. “I’ve become a bit desensitized to it. At least, friends and family have learned to stop looking, so I’m not caught unawares like this.”

Louis looked out across the twinkling lights of the city. “I know people are unnecessarily cruel to celebrities, it’s the price you pay for being in public, blah blah, but I’m honestly a little floored that there is this much hate over, twenty pictures max, of us just shopping.” He threw his hands up in exasperation. “It’s going to get worse, isn’t it?”

Harry sighed, “Probably. I imagine when it’s actually announced that I’m out, that there will be a good amount of hate tossed your way. But none of them know you. No one that honestly knows you would think you’re anything less than wonderful.”

“Most of the time I’m a twat who can’t hold his tongue.”

“Yeah.” Harry laughed. “That’s true. Still pretty wonderful though.”

They sat back and looked over the dark mountains, the city in the distance. Louis thought about how the media was going to portray him, how the fandom was going to see what it wanted to see, and Louis wondered if Harry was worth the trouble. Something tightened in his core when he thought about giving Harry up, walking away from the nicest, funniest, most caring person he had come across in ages. He knew he wanted to see this thing through, see where they could end up, but he had to steel himself as well. He didn’t know if he was strong enough.

“Hey, Harry...” 

Harry drew his eyes back from the incredible landscape in front of him to Louis.

“I’m still wrapping my head around this,” Louis started cautiously. 

Harry nodded. “It’d honestly worry me more if you weren’t. This isn’t, like, a test, but, I think knowing that you’re being cautious, about everything, comforts me a bit. I tend to be too trusting of people in general, letting them in before I should.”

Louis didn’t have any doubts that Harry would agree to his next question. “Can we just go slow with, everything? Make sure we’re checking in with each other?” 

Louis didn’t have much experience with good communication; training at the academy meant absolutely no boyfriends. He was too scared to come out of the closet, so for years he just had lonely wanks and an occasional kissing session with other guys that were either experimenting or closeted. And none of the men he had chosen over the past few years had stuck around long enough for him to get any practice. 

“Yeah, of course. I haven’t, uh, pressured you into going too fast, right?” Harry always spoke extra slow when he was doubting himself.

Louis thought about the times they’ve kissed, sometimes lazily with no intention, but other times it was heated, and so far one of them had pulled away before it went further every time. Recently, all of his wank fantasies included Harry, he knew soon he’d want go further, but wanted to make sure they both felt right about it. 

“Not at all darling, you’ve been wonderful, honestly. It’s… Most of the dates I go on, there’s just, no chemistry. But then when there is, it seems like the guys are just bloody awful. I think I maybe don’t have the same… expectations as most guys.”

Harry cleared his throat. “Okay.” The light from the house was weak, but even so, Louis could see the blush high on his cheeks. Harry finished his cigarette before he spoke again, and then his voice was almost a whisper. “This is all new to me. I have, like, uh, almost no experience, so I don’t know what’s, like, normal.”

Louis laughed; his own normal didn’t seem to match up to anyone else’s. Harry’s wide eyes were back to the bright city and his teeth were clamped on his lower lip. “Oh shit. Sorry, not laughing at you. I’m really, _really_ not. I was laughing because I don’t know what’s normal either.” 

Harry nodded. “So we’ll make our own normal.”

Louis felt like there wasn’t quite enough room in his chest for all he was feeling; heart and lungs threatening to stutter out into the night. 

“All of this; us and,” he waved his arm alluding to the city below, “everything else; it’s just a lot, you know.”

Harry hummed in agreement. “Yeah. I know.”

Louis wondered if he could keep his shit together, if all of it could turn into something great. 

▵▵▵

Louis learned that a lot of the rooms in his hotel were booked by celebrities getting ready since the amFAR event was just a few blocks away. He had managed to shower, fix his hair, do his makeup, then redo his makeup when he worried it wasn’t exactly right. But he was still in his pants, unable to actually get dressed. 

Harry and his team were in a room right down the hall, also getting ready for the stupid fucking red carpet. Louis honestly couldn’t remember why he agreed to go in the first place. 

_i’m shitting it_ not the most poetic of texts, but Louis found himself sat on his bed shaking while Liam tried to amp him up for the night ahead. Liam’s tactics, listing all the celebrities he’d see and getting his picture taken (proof that he’d been there!) was making it worse, so ordering him to bed and refusing to answer his texts finally shut him up. 

Harry’s text came back almost immediately _literally?_

Louis responded with the winking, stuck out tongue emoji, then _not currently. can’t stop shaking though_

 _doing better than i was for my 1st then. stylist was about to kill me_  
_kept having to run to the toilet and dry heaved the whole time she was trying to get me dressed_

Louis tried to imagine the confident Harry he knew—a wall of paps didn’t even faze him—being the scared kid he must have been back then. 

_what if i end up on the worst dressed list?_

Harry responded with multiple texts that came in rapid succession.

 _you’re wearing the tux that was tailored for you._  
_unless you binned it and decided to walk wearing your joggers._  
_honestly, don’t think you’ll make any list._  
_can’t really go wrong with a tux that fits. standard fare innit?_

Logically, he knew Harry was right. He doubted that anyone would even want his photo. Maybe he’d get away with just blending in with the crowd of publicists behind the celebrities. 

_not in the bin. still freshly pressed hanging in the closet_ he sent a picture along with it, a selfie with an exaggerated scared face with the tux hanging in the background

Harry sent three more messages.  
_love the quiff. is that a rosy glitter eye liner?_  
_get dressed_  
_we’re leaving in five. harry’s coming over now to do a once over_

There was a loud knock on the door as the last text came through. Louis could honestly kiss Harry, his Harry, not stylist Harry, for sending stylist Harry over and ensuring he somehow wasn’t botching the whole thing. 

▵▵▵

Louis stumbled out of the tall Escalade that dropped them off at the beginning of the red carpet. Harry reached out instantaneously and straightened him up, ensuring that he was okay. Harry looked gorgeous in the perfectly tailored tuxedo, long and lean. His hair was styled up and away from his face, loose enough that he could still drag his ringed fingers through when he needed something to do with his hands. 

Louis’ palms were sweating so he rubbed his hands together before trying to swipe his fringe. He realized his hair was still in a quiff and thought, not for the first time that night, that he needed to get his nervous tics under control. 

Louis nodded, not trusting his voice, when Harry asked if he was ready. Harry looked him in the eye, reminding him that if he didn’t want to walk the carpet he could meet him inside. Harry needed this though, so Louis was going to be brave so Harry could be brave. He put what he feared was a slightly terrified smile on his face and assured Harry, “No place I’d rather be.” The smile that Harry radiated back shifted something in Louis’ stomach; he realized it wasn’t just lip service. 

His smile relaxed into something more natural and with that Harry drew his eyes away from Louis, squeezed his hand, and started to walk towards the flashes. Every time Harry had to step up to the line of reporters and answer questions he’d give Louis a lingering glance, and more than once they made eye contact during an interview. Harry only pulled away from Louis’ stare when a rough elbow from Niall reminded him where he was. 

The red carpet was louder than Louis expected and between the fans on the stands and the sea of celebrity teams Louis couldn’t hear what questions Harry was answering. But he was sure that social media would blow up since Niall forewarned them that questions about their relationship were not going to be blacklisted. Harry would be coy and evade any actual answers, but they’d be asked.

At the end of the line of reporters there was a stationary place for the photographers to get solo pictures with no distractions in the background. Harry plastered on a smile and posed for a few seconds as the photographers in front of him tried to get his attention.

“Louis!”

Louis looked around and was surprised to see Harry holding his arm out, drawing Louis into a picture. 

Louis took and deep breath and joined Harry, who wrapped his arm tight around Louis’ waist, fingers roughly digging in. Louis ran his hand up and down Harry’s back slowly. There was no way these photos could possibly be disguised as friendship; no one took bromance pictures on the red carpet, right? His heart pounded as he was blinded by a wall of flashes and a sea of voices yelled at him to look in their direction. He was sure he was going to look awkward as fuck, but he kept a smile on until his cheeks hurt. 

They beelined for the bar as soon as they were inside, Harry ordering gin and tonics for them both. As they waited for their drinks Harry moved in close to Louis. Louis felt the ghost of Harry’s lips on his ear. “You okay?”

Harry’s voice sent goosebumps rippling down Louis’ arms, the timbre just enough to make him suck in a deep breath. 

“Yeah, fine, thanks,” Louis responded in the same low volume. 

Harry pulled away enough that Louis could see his eyes had gone dark as they met Louis’ own. The tension between them was palpable, with no release valve. 

It would be hours until they were alone. 

Louis dragged his fingertips across Harry's back when he left for the restroom then swayed his hips as he walked away, feeling Harry’s eyes drawn to his body. Harry caught Louis’ eye and proceeded to lick away some Alfredo sauce stuck in the corner of his mouth; Louis bit down hard on his lower lip. Both of them missed several questions lobbed their way while they were distracted by fingers teasing up their inseams under the table. At the end Louis couldn’t remember who won a single award or what the donation speeches touched on.

After they said their goodbyes and were walking towards the cars, Harry caught Louis’ elbow and pulled him in close to his ear again. “Come home with me?” 

"Harry, I—" Louis drew up short and thought for a moment. "I move really slowly. It has nothing to do with you personally; but I don’t want you to get your hopes up."

"That's okay, Louis, I just want to spend time with you. We can go as slow as you want." Harry nuzzled into Louis' neck, the smallest bit of scruff brushing against his skin. 

Louis stiffened and pulled away to look at Harry. "People always say that. They lie."

“Our own normal, yeah?”

Louis didn’t trust his voice, he nodded and grabbed Harry’s hand.

The ride back was silent as they caressed each other’s legs. Harry worked his way higher and higher, and at only a twitch away from the tent in Louis’ trousers, he raised an eyebrow, a silent _okay?_ to which Louis nodded. Louis had to watch out the window as they drove through the Hollywood Hills, if Harry asked to go a step further, he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from throwing his head back in a moan. The second the car came to a stop he sat astride Harry grinding down filthily before opening the door and sprinting to Harry’s porch. 

Harry slammed Louis up against the door as soon as they were inside, a quick shock jarred his shoulders before the kiss turned rough and all pain was forgotten. 

Harry’s arms tightened around Louis’ waist, bringing Louis’ crotch right against Harry’s thigh. Louis rode Harry’s thigh for a few seconds, the pressure of his strong muscles against Louis’ hard cock was exquisite. Louis let out a moan and threw his head back. Harry took his opportunity and attached his mouth to the long length of Louis’ neck, lining kisses from his collar all the way to the space behind his ear, which Louis rewarded with another filthy moan. 

“Whoa, little bro!” Gemma shouted from the living room. Harry took a step back, gnawing on his bottom lip, and gave Louis a once over, eyes feral in the dark.

“Bedroom?” Harry let out a growl in her general direction, damning the open floor plan under his breath. Louis wasn’t yet used to the feeling of Harry whispering in his ear, and goosebumps bloomed down his neck. 

The _please_ Louis let out was louder and more of a moan than he meant, but he couldn’t even find it in himself to be embarrassed by his neediness. Harry grabbed his hand and led him down the hallway to the master bedroom. 

Harry reattached their lips and walked Louis to his bed until they fell over, limbs grasping at each other. “What do you want?” Harry asked, his voice lower than Louis had ever heard. 

“Your hands. Need my trousers off now, want to see how those huge hands look on my cock.” Louis rushed.

Louis let out an embarrassingly loud choked off noise from the back of his throat while Harry tried unsuccessfully to pull his trousers off. Harry’s stupidly perfect mouth was only separated from Louis’ twitching penis by a thin layer of pants; he tensed; then relaxed as Harry kept moving down. Harry quickly moved to untie Louis’ shoes with clumsy fingers and finally slid them off, flinging them across the room. He then pulled Louis’ trousers the rest of the way off, freeing his trapped legs. Finally Harry pulled off Louis’ pants, exposing his hard cock. Louis grasped at the sheets to keep from touching himself. 

Louis was able to catch his breath when Harry stood to get himself undressed at the foot of the bed. Louis sat up against the headboard and took his own tuxedo jacket off. He slowly stroked himself, white tux shirt still on but unbuttoned, as he watched Harry’s frantic movements. Their eyes stayed with each other across the length of the bed.

Harry launched himself to the middle of the bed to cover Louis’ body with his own. They picked up on the kissing where they left off, rough and sloppy. Louis ran his fingers roughly through Harry’s hair, pulling it occasionally, making Harry groan. Harry nipped at Louis’ lips and jawline. Tiny blooms of pain made him leak more precome. Louis bucked up into Harry’s hips and Harry aligned himself so their stiff cocks were side by side. 

Harry’s first drag of his hand up their cocks was rough, but the precome resting on their slits when he reached the top and swiped across with his thumb eased the way down. Their cocks were big enough that even the breadth of Harry’s hand couldn’t quite hold onto both at the same time, so Louis joined, bringing his hand down to grab a hold of Harry. Their knuckles brushed together again and again as they stroked and twisted their hands around each other’s heads. 

Their foreheads pressed together, Louis could feel Harry’s hot breath mingling with his own.

Louis knew Harry was close, his stuttering hips the give away, and Harry finally came with Louis’ name on his lips with his head thrown back, and eyes tightly closed. It was possibly the most beautiful scene Louis had ever witnessed. Somehow Harry was able to keep working Louis through his own pleasure and that, combined with Harry’s face still flushed and gorgeous coming down from his high, brought Louis over the edge too. 

They clung to each other, still panting, their sticky come spreading every time they adjusted their hips. They peppered kisses over each other’s skin, covering every available surface. 

“Should’ve warned you I’m a post-sex cuddler,” Louis finally muttered, eliciting a laugh from Harry. 

“If you think I’m letting you go…”

Harry rolled over and opened his nightstand drawer, pulling out a pack of baby wipes. After cleaning them both off, he slid Louis’ shirt down his arms and tossed it to the corner of the room. Harry then arranged himself to be the little spoon. Louis pressed his torso against Harry’s back, holding on tightly, their legs tangled together. He matched his own breathing to Harry’s as they drifted off to sleep. 

▵▵▵

Harry woke up in the middle of the night. Louis was tucked in the crook of his neck and he gave a single tight squeeze before extricating himself. 

He had to wee desperately and could feel the echo of a headache from the gin he had earlier that night. He really didn’t want to move, but he also wasn’t into watersports (and that’s certainly a kink requiring discussion anyway) so he set about gently untangling himself from Louis, trying his hardest to let him get a proper night’s rest after suffering from jet lag the past few days. After weeing, he moved quietly through the house to the kitchen to get some Advil. 

As he tiptoed nude through the dark hallway that opened into the great room and then the kitchen, he heard quiet noises that he couldn’t suss out. The television was on, casting a blue light over a portion of the room, and Gemma and Niall were on the sofa. Gemma was lying between Niall’s legs, her head resting on his bare chest. His hands were moving through her hair very slowly. His eyes were closed and other than his moving fingers they were still enough that they could have been asleep. Harry passed by quickly, wanting to get in and out of the kitchen as soon as possible without them noticing. 

He’d never dispensed the pills so slowly, trying to prevent the bottle from rattling. He dry swallowed two pills, then started the trek back to the bedroom. When he turned the corner though, it was obvious that the couple on the sofa was awake. His eyes widened as he saw them kissing. 

He had been trying without success to get them together, and here they were making out in the middle of the night on his sofa. He crept back across the room, trying his best to avoid the floorboard that occasionally creaked, and hoped they wouldn’t see him. Harry needed to find out if this was an ongoing thing between them and they were playing him for a fool, or if his meddling had finally paid off. 


	7. Chapter 7

Harry arrived at the pitch five minutes into the match. He hadn’t told Louis, or anyone, that he was coming; he was worried about drawing attention away from the kids. He knew from Louis’ worrying that they had been training extra hard and if they beat Tottenheim then they would advance to the semi-finals of the FA Youth Cup. 

It was easy to convince Niall to tag along; he would show up at a darts competition if there were a promise of a good rivalry. Gemma decided to join last minute as well; Harry didn’t think she’d be interested, having never sat through a football match before, but she entered the elevator when Harry shouted out a thirty second warning before he left. Harry was so busy rooting for Arsenal Academy and staring at Louis that he almost missed how close Gemma and Niall were sat on the stands. Their sides were glued together, legs and arms touching. Niall didn’t even stand to cheer when Louis’ team scored off a penalty kick to take the lead 1-0. 

Once the excitement of the goal died down, Harry lost track of the match for the rest of the half as he just watched Louis on the other side of the pitch coaching the team. 

Louis was passionate, jumping in excitement when a play was executed correctly or the goalie made any saves. He shouted down the pitch, supporting his players, until his hair began to stick to his head with sweat. Harry had never been so attracted to someone. 

Harry turned to Niall and exclaimed, “I can't believe they're winning, it's sick!” and in his joy almost missed that the two next to him were loosely holding hands. Niall refused to turn his head or make eye contact, but Harry saw his cheeks turn a shade pinker as he blushed. However, Harry had more important things to focus on, like Louis’ powerful legs as he jogged off the field at halftime. 

He stood up, stiff from the stands, with the intention of buying a drink at the nearest open food stand. He walked off alone when Niall and Gemma decided they didn’t need anything. Emirates Stadium was eerily quiet when it wasn’t packed full of fans. He walked along the outer rim of the stadium hoping something was open. 

Harry was thankful that the line was long, so he had a reprieve from Gemma and Niall, and wondered if they’d actually come to him to let him know they were a couple. 

By the time Harry made it back to his seat (with a sausage for Niall because he knew he’d complain of hunger before the end of the match) the team was jogging back to the pitch. Niall and Gemma were leaning into each other, lost in their own bubble. He cleared his throat when he sat back down and Niall jumped away so fast he almost knocked the sausage from Harry’s hand.

Harry’s first instinct was to toss a knowing wink Gemma’s way, but if they were going to act like nothing out of the ordinary was going on, then he could too. He resolutely stared straight ahead and focused on the game that was starting back up. 

Arsenal _seemed_ to be working together effortlessly, with beautiful passes and quick footwork they easily held control through the second half and came away with a 2-0 win. When the final whistle blew, the team formed a cheering pile, all whooping and patting each others’ backs, with Louis right at the center. 

Louis looked like the sun with how brightly he shone. Harry was insanely proud that Louis’ work with the team seemed to be paying off. 

Harry sent Louis a text while the trio walked back to the car, congratulating him on the win. He didn’t get an immediate response and figured they were celebrating in the locker room. 

Harry’s initial plan was to watch in secret; he didn’t want to come off as a creepy stalker since he wasn’t invited to come watch the match, but he got carried away in the excitement of the win and couldn’t stop himself. 

On the drive to drop Niall back at his own flat, Harry could tell that he had paid almost no attention to the match at all. His suspicions were confirmed when he invented a trick play and Niall went with it, offering up that it was “really wicked.” 

When he pulled up to the curb he tried to keep his face neutral and not laugh at the other two who were trying to come up with an explanation why Gemma was getting out at Niall’s instead of coming back to Harry’s flat. They stuttered out something clearly made up on the spot. 

Harry’s face finally cracked and he waved them off with a big smile, “See you later, lovebirds!” Niall turned to give him double middle fingers and Harry laughed as he drove away. 

▵▵▵

Harry swayed his ass to the music blaring from the kitchen stereo as he pulled out the ingredients to make a cheese toastie for tea, that he’d eat as he read scripts. He’d arrived home and stripped to his boxers, slung low on his hips. As one song faded into the next he heard his phone buzzing against the counter and dove to answer it when he saw that it was Louis calling. 

Louis was downstairs and wanted security to let him in. Harry had a quick conversation with the guard and told him to put Louis on 'the list' to ensure he could come up whenever he felt like dropping by. Harry doubled up on supplies. 

Louis stomped over after the elevator let him out. “Did you come to the match?” he demanded. Harry couldn’t read his face and wasn’t sure if he had managed to make Louis angry by showing up. 

“Yes?” Harry felt oddly exposed, standing in just his boxers. 

Louis’ face fell for a fraction of a second, into a look that Harry hadn’t yet deciphered, before he schooled his face, “Why?”

“I wanted to support you.” Harry answered honestly. “I’m sorry if I was overstepping, I won’t come again if you don’t want me to.”

Louis remained on the other side of the kitchen, hands on his cocked hips, measuring up Harry from across the room. 

Harry needed to fill the silence, “I didn’t want my being there to be a big thing, you know, so I didn’t tell anyone. I wanted to make sure the focus was on the match and not me. I wore a snapback and I don’t think anyone recognized me…” He faltered and hoped that this wasn’t going to be a dealbreaker. He _honestly_ didn’t think it would be a big deal. 

Louis’ whole demeanor shifted, his face went soft and he took a deep breath before launching himself into Harry’s arms. He nuzzled his face into Harry’s neck and whispered, “It _is_ a big deal.” He pulled Harry into a tight hug, then squeezed harder for a brief moment. “No one has ever been so supportive.”

“So you’re not mad?”

Louis responded by pulling Harry into a deep kiss. He gave the hair at the nape of Harry’s neck a little tug and Harry moaned, arching his back and pressing his crotch against Louis. He could feel Louis’ hard cock pressed against his thigh and couldn’t help himself as he rutted against the small, muscular body in front of him. The kiss got progressively dirtier and sloppier as they continued to use each other’s bodies to get off, moaning and gasping for breath. Louis gently ran his hands up the flanks of Harry’s chest, teasing his nails along the way, before settling on his nipples, pinching and rubbing them. Harry couldn’t stop as he bucked up harshly against Louis’ crotch. 

“Gonna—” he gasped.  
“So close—” Louis responded.

Harry tensed, he knew nothing would stop the impending orgasm that had his body on the very edge of overwhelming pleasure. All it took was Louis ducking his head down to lick across his left nipple for him to crash over the edge, shaking as he felt the spurts of come releasing from his body. Louis followed moments later, his body jerking as he came in his pants, clinging to Harry. 

They gently rubbed their wet clothes against each other until the combination of oversensitivity and cooling come on the fabric became too uncomfortable. 

Maybe Harry would make it a point to attend every match.

“So what’s for tea?” Louis finally asked, peeling himself off of Harry. 

“Let me get us some clean clothes and then I’ll make you whatever you want.” Harry returned a few minutes later with boxers and his favorite old trackies for Louis. 

He found Louis stripped, sitting naked on the counter, dirty pile of clothes in the corner, as he flipped through his phone. 

“Mmmmm, I could get used to this,” Harry moaned as he pulled Louis’ attention back from the phone to his lips with a smacking kiss. “Bit unsanitary of course, but naked is a good look on you.”

“Thoroughly cleaned me bum right before I came over, I’ll have you know,” Louis claimed with indignation. Then he shoved his phone in Harry’s hands. “Not as slick as you think you are.” Harry looked down to find a collection of blurry shots of him at the match earlier, standing in line for sausages and sat back on the stands.

All events with Louis were supposed to be cleared in advance. His team was going to kill him. 

▵▵▵

Harry refused to let some fan photos ruin his night with Louis. He shut off his phone so he wouldn’t have to listen to the incessant buzzing as his team repeatedly called and texted to barrage him with questions and plans to squelch the story. He recommended that Louis do the same. 

Harry ended up making them tacos, Louis helped chop the toppings, until he got bored and instead started a game of truth or dare. Louis had to apply full-face make up, Harry had to paint his nails, Louis wrote 'Thug Life' across Harry’s stomach in fancy script, and Harry had to dance without music for five straight minutes, amongst other dares. 

While answering truths they both told meandering stories and asked follow-up questions. How they came out to their families and their big gay revelations. Louis told stories about his best mates, ‘the lad crew,’ and promised that Harry would meet them all soon. What they imagined their lives would be like as adults when they were children and where they saw themselves in ten years. Louis confessed how much he hated anal sex and Harry admitted with an embarrassed blush that he hadn’t yet done it, so he didn’t have an opinion. 

It may have taken them two and a half hours to make the tacos by the time they finished since most of the dares were interrupted by bouts of laughter and each truth led to a whole conversation. They were famished by the time tea was actually ready, and they ended up eating while standing in the kitchen, not even bothering to get settled around the table. 

After their late meal, Harry suggested a movie and they tucked themselves on the sofa as _Love Actually_ started. Louis woke up towards the end of the movie as Sam ran through the airport. 

“Mmm, sorry,” Louis slurred into Harry’s armpit. 

“It’s fine. You have cute snores,” he whispered. Harry continued to trail his hand up and down the length of Louis’ arm, as he had through the entire movie, only mixing it up by lightly scratching his head or teasing around his ear. 

Louis let out a huge yawn before answering. “I don’t snore and I should get going.”

“Nah, you should stay. I don’t want to give up cuddling you yet, and I don’t want you falling asleep behind the wheel.” Harry hated the idea of Louis leaving the comfort of his arms. 

Louis halfheartedly threw an arm in the direction of the hallway that led to Harry’s bedroom. “Hazza, take me to bed.” Louis barely got the words out before the telly was off and Harry managed to pick Louis up bridal style and carry him to the bedroom. Louis only managed to snuggle tight against Harry before he fell back to sleep. 

▵▵▵

In the morning, they had to face the repercussions of Harry attending the match. They were summoned to the London office in order to be yelled at for their carelessness. Harry suspected that they knew there was more to his and Louis’ relationship than the PR they were trying to generate, but it still felt too new and fragile to share with all the soulless Suits. He didn't want to give them anything more. He even tried to talk Louis out of going, since he had done nothing wrong and didn’t know that Harry had planned on going to the match. But they were insistent that they needed to see them together. 

On the car ride over, they quickly went over what Harry was planning on saying to the team. They fell into silence as they sat in traffic trying to cross the city. Louis was fidgeting more than usual, so Harry finally asked Raul to turn down the music so they could talk. 

“What’s wrong? You’re being _quietly_ restless instead of _menacingly_ restless and it’s unsettling.” The smile he was using to soften the question disappeared when Louis didn’t even turn from looking out the window. “Seriously, what’s up?”

Louis’ voice was barely a whisper, “Is this a terrible idea?”

“It might be, but we don’t really have a choice. When they say jump I have to say how high.”

“No, not the meeting, which will suck, I’m sure, but this—us—going behind your team’s back. I don’t want to ruin your career.”

“You won’t. I promise.” Louis still hadn’t turned, resolutely focused on the city around them. “Hey, look at me. I’m serious.”

Louis turned, but his face was steeled in indifference. “It’s their job, though, right? To keep you from doing stupid shit that will alienate your fans? I don’t want to feel like I’m the stupid shit that you need to be protected from.”

They spoke over each other. “Lou, no. no. no no. That’s—” “Enough people have suggested that I’m not worth it and—”

Harry raised his voice. “I won’t let them.” Louis shut his mouth and fixed his fringe. “Louis, I won’t. I know we haven’t really discussed it, but I really like you. These dates we’ve been going on, they’re the most fun I’ve had in awhile. I’m not going to let them pull the plug on this.”

“But what—”

“Unless I’ve been terribly wrong about the signals you’ve been sending, it seems like you’re into me too. I’m sure it’s not a big deal to most people, but this,” he pointed his finger between the two of them, “finding someone who actually likes me too. It’s pretty rare and I’m not going to let them destroy it.”

Louis opened his mouth with another argument but Harry steamrolled on, “We’re going to go in there, and they’re going to yell at me for going rogue, for not telling them that I was seeing you outside of appointed hours. And I’m going to lie to them.”

“Harry,” Louis began.

“I’m going to lie and say that we’re just friends. That I knew this was important to you and I just wanted to show some support. They won’t be happy. They hate when I try to take the slightest bit of control, but I won’t let them destroy us by making you question your place in my life, or my commitment to my career. I can have both, I deserve a chance at both.” Harry finished his speech with hardly any breath left.

Harry was angrier with his team than he had ever been before. Saying that out loud, vocalizing that he did want to find a partner while still being able to live his acting dreams, cemented that he was going to fight for their blossoming relationship, but more importantly he was going to fight for more autonomy within his team.

His speech must have changed something in Louis too, because instead of looking defeated, his eyes also burned with indignation. He nodded, then clasped Harry’s free hand in his. “Okay, then. You and me, Team Larry Stylinson united to defeat the evil Suits. We'll pretend to be just friends if that’s what it takes to win.” 

Harry let out a laugh and silently thanked the universe for sending him this beautiful boy. 

▵▵▵

Louis still hadn’t solved the interpersonal problems with his youth team. He had found out from an anonymous source that two unnamed kids on the team had been dating and then broke up, resulting in the most of their teammates picking sides. 

Louis was initially shocked that all this happened under his nose. With all his years of covert hookups in locker rooms, he assumed he would’ve been more attuned to the signs of a relationship blooming and dying right in front of him. The pining. The tense glances. The averted eyes. 

He had somehow missed it all. Maybe he wasn’t meant to be a coach if he missed relationships between his players and then couldn’t find a way to get them all to work together in the aftermath. 

The lack of communication and small squabbles off the field could not have been more evident on the field. The anonymous note was scant on details, which made confronting the problem head-on difficult. He couldn’t even harp on them about losing games because of it since they were on a winning streak, but he knew the team could be play much better, but he couldn’t figure out a way to get through to them. 

Neither boy felt like they could come to Louis about his problems either. The note alluded to the idea that there was no one they could confide in. That was the worst part. 

Plus, he was having thoughts about Harry, planning _things_ that he had never planned before. 

His brain hurt. 

When Louis walked into his flat, Liam was sat on the sofa. Thank God. 

“Honey, I’m home!” Louis collapsed next to his best friend. Liam didn’t move his eyes from the telly, though Louis suspected this might be his hundredth time watching _The Dark Knight_. “What’s for tea?” He prodded Liam with his toes. 

“Sorry,” Liam snapped out of his daze and finally looked over at Louis, small smile edging his lips. “I kissed someone today.”

“Get in, Leemo!” Louis’ problems were momentarily sidetracked in excitement for his roommate. “They must be something else if they’ve got you like this.”

“Yeah, actually. I really like him, I think.” Liam gave a sheepish look. He fidgeted with the hem of his shirt, wrapping it tight around his finger then releasing it, then rewrapping. 

Louis prodded, “That’s all I get; you think you really like him? Come on, spill the goods.”

Liam hesitated, “We met at that R&B showcase a few weeks ago. He’s quiet and nice and plays American football. Got drafted professionally, even.”

“Sounds like a catch.” Harry would’ve appreciated the pun that went right over Liam’s head. 

“He’s the most gorgeous man I’ve ever seen. He has these soulful eyes, and his smile…” Liam trailed off and a blush rose to his cheeks. 

Louis had never seen Liam so caught up in someone before. “So you’re going to see him again?”

“Yeah, probably. I don’t want to jinx it though, so I’m officially dropping the subject. How was practice? Cohesive yet?”

“Nah; they’re still splintered. But no fear, I’ll think of something eventually.”

They sat in silence for a bit as the movie played in the background. Louis couldn’t focus though, “Hey, Lima Bean, can I ask you something?”

“Only if you stop calling me Lima Bean.”

“You know that’s never going to happen.” Louis rearranged himself on the sofa so his head was on Liam’s lap and his feet stretched across to the opposite arm. “Pet me.”

“So, it’s serious then,” Liam started running his fingers through Louis’ hair. They had been roommates long enough for him to know Louis needed a good cuddle to talk though big issues. 

“I’m thinking about sleeping with Harry.”

“You sleep at Harry’s all the time.”

“I mean, sex. Like, penetrative butt stuff sex.”

“Butt stuff,” Liam parroted back in a laugh.

Louis whined. “It’s stupid of me to be thinking about it, right? Like, he’s a famous, charming actor who could have anyone he wanted. And I’m technically getting paid to hang out with him.” 

“You’re technically getting paid to get papped a few times. I think this goes above and beyond the call of duty.”

Louis hummed. 

“Is he pressuring you?” Louis always appreciated how fast Liam went from puppy dog to guard dog when he thought someone might be mistreating his friends. 

Louis shook his head, “Not at all. I’ve told him I don’t really do that, and he was fine with it. Like, really, honestly okay with it. We haven’t even blown each other.”

“What?” Liam started to laugh. “Seriously?”

Louis swatted him with a pillow. “Yes, seriously, you jerk. It’ll happen soon. Hasn’t been the right time yet.”

“Anytime is the right time for a blowie.”

Louis groaned. “Whatever. Nevermind.”

“Honestly, that you’re even considering ‘butt stuff’ is a big deal. He must be a good guy, yeah?” Liam tweaked one of Louis’ nipples through his shirt. “What’s wrong with giving it a go?”

Louis couldn’t pinpoint what was wrong, nothing was really wrong, it was more that he didn’t understand why suddenly this was something that he was considering trying again. It was messy and it hurt and the few times he had tried it, it just wasn’t worth all the prep—if there even was prep—and honestly it was just more trouble than it was worth. 

If he could get a terrific blowjob, he’d hands down choose that option instead, every time. There was just something which was vague and unsettling that Louis couldn’t pin down that made him think it might be worth it to try with Harry. 

It didn’t feel like he was being played by Harry, he didn’t think that at all. They just had so much fun together. He thought maybe, just maybe, it wouldn’t be awkward, but that they could relax and have fun with it. They could at least try, and if he still didn’t like it, then he didn’t think their relationship would be ruined, he thought they might be strong enough to work through potential awkward outcomes. 

Liam listened to all of Louis’ waffling back and forth. He wasn’t responding much, other than an occasional hum, but as long as he knew Harry wasn’t trying to push him into something he wasn’t comfortable with, the best support Liam could offer was to encourage Louis to have this conversation with Harry instead of with him. Louis knew Liam was right. It was something he was going to put back on the table to discuss at some point soon.

▵▵▵

They next date they were sent on by the team was a little more serious and anyone who wasn’t being willfully ignorant would understand they were meant to be dating, not just friends, though there wouldn’t be an official statement released for another month or so. 

Louis assumed that the whole Arsenal organization would put the pieces together after the story dropped, if they hadn’t already. He hoped it wouldn’t change anything. Wanger had been nothing but supportive, which should have made it less nerve-wracking. But. He still wasn’t _quite_ ready to actually tell everyone; though he’d have to soon.

They had dinner reservations at Clos Maggiore, and the gossip rags were going to report that Harry had not just booked a private dining room, but rather the whole restaurant. They had the roaring fireplace, fairy lights, and arching flowers overhead all to themselves. Louis couldn’t help but get swept up a bit in the romance of it all. 

Over their candlelit dinner, they joked around and had as much fun as they would’ve getting curry takeaway. Louis couldn’t help but notice an extra sparkle in Harry’s eye though; the spectacle was something else. He felt lucky getting to experience a dinner like this, and although he knew that Harry’s team had put it all together, Harry had still picked him up at his doorstep with a bouquet of flowers in his hand. 

After dinner, they kissed slowly and passionately as the world around them, including the paps impatiently waiting outside, faded away and Louis’ only focus was the pressure from Harry’s lips, the slide of his tongue, and his large hands wrapped around his body. 

Next, they got a private docent tour of the British Museum. Even though the museum had technically been closed for hours, they opened it back up for the two of them, and they spent a few hours wandering and checking out any exhibit that they wanted. 

It was, again, the best date Louis had ever been on, fancy locations notwithstanding. He could’ve kept walking with Harry, hearing his stories and listening when he was telling him about certain famous artists and his favorite pieces in the museum, all night. His voice was so soothing and he was so knowledgeable, his stories were so dryly funny that he kept Louis laughing. 

Once they said their thanks and goodnight to the docent and then the few paps who had waited for their exit, they got back into their waiting car, exhausted. 

“Wanna get some ice cream and bring it back to mine?” Louis asked. 

Harry kissed him again, that tantalizing mix that Harry had perfected of firm and gentle at the same time. “Sounds like perfection.”

They had their driver drop them off on the corner a block away from Louis’ flat. They ducked into Londis, Louis’ go-to for late night munchies or stress cigarettes, and debated in front of the frozen section the merits of Caramel Chew Chewy vs Phish Food, finally deciding just to get both. 

The cashier and Louis struck up their normal small talk, Louis simplifying their date to just “dinner and looking at some art” before introducing Harry. The man clearly had no idea who Harry was, or didn’t care at all, and ended up taking Louis’ side in the great ice cream debate. He told them to come back soon, since it was lonely on the overnight shift, and Louis promised they would. 

They held hands as they walked to Louis’ flat, enjoying the noise of the city around them and not needing to fill the relative silence with conversation. They stripped off their trousers, undid their ties, and relaxed a few buttons on their shirts before they grabbed spoons from the kitchen and finally plopped themselves down on the sofa. Harry instinctively started rubbing Louis’ feet as Louis booted up Netflix. The end of the night was such a stark contrast to the beginning of the night that it felt like two separate nights. Louis loved how they were just themselves whether on a fancy-pants date or literally just in their pants on the sofa. When they were sufficiently stuffed, Harry lost the rock, paper, scissors decision and had to get up to put the rapidly thawing ice cream back in the freezer. 

He fell back on the sofa upon his return, covering all of Louis’ body with his own. Louis bent down to kiss his forehead and then started a small plait in Harry’s hair until they both drifted off to sleep, movie still playing. 

They woke up in the morning, stiff and snippy at each other for letting them sleep there instead of making each other crawl into bed. Their shirts were rumpled and the morning hair between the two of them made Louis double over in laughter when they stood next to each other while brushing their teeth. 

Louis liked this version of them a lot more than the version of them circulating around the internet, showing off their date from the night before. 

If the urgency Harry showed in getting Louis stripped and laid out in the bed was any indication, Harry agreed with him. 


	8. Chapter 8

The drive to Holmes Chapel was faster than Louis expected. Harry sang along loudly to the radio and made up funny lyrics to pop hits. It was so endearing that Louis played along, trying not to let on how nervous he was to meet all of Harry’s closest family over a single weekend. 

He had just been able to finally settle himself and calm his nerves as they drove past the sign announcing their arrival to the small village. In his twenty-three years he had never done the whole ‘meet the family’ thing. Louis considered himself to be pretty confident, but something about having to impress a whole family at once, a family that only had Harry’s best interest at heart, and probably was already skeptical about their relationship to begin with, set him on edge. He wasn’t even starting on an even plane, he would definitely have to prove that he was decent and then get them to love him. 

Harry prepped Louis as best as he could: Anne was his fiercely protective mother and Gemma his older sister who Louis had only seen briefly out of the corner of his eye when she called them out for humping in the front hall—a supremely mortifying moment when he looked back on it the next morning. Plus, Robin, Harry’s stepfather who had been in Harry’s life for many years, Mike his older stepbrother, Amy his stepsister, and her husband and their kid. 

Good thing he had a lifetime of experience with a full house. Louis’ plan was to focus on the kid. The three-year-old was likely the key to breaking into the whole family. 

As they pulled into the driveway, Louis’ heart worked overtime. He absentmindedly fixed his fringe and Harry held his free hand between his. 

“It’ll be fine,” Harry assured him. Harry pulled Louis in for a slow, deep kiss, tongues sliding over each other, while Harry cradled Louis’ face and lightly scratched a bit right behind Louis’ ear. 

Louis spoke into the kiss, “I don’t want it to be fine. I want to smash it.” It came out more muffled than he anticipated, and he gently shook his head when Harry asked him to repeat it. “Now or never. Let’s go before I chicken out.”

Harry pulled a funny face, which Louis copied, and with a final hand squeeze they left the car and made their way inside. 

Less than an hour into the weekend, Louis saw how silly it had been to be scared of Harry’s family. Every one of them greeted him with a tight hug and kind greetings. Once the introductions were over a beer was thrust into his hand and he hovered in the kitchen while Harry and Anne prepared a roast for tea. 

Harry filled her in on Louis’ jobs, how he split his time between coaching footie and working with struggling teens at Mosaic. Normally the jokester in his group of friends, Louis couldn’t help but throw in a few self-deprecating remarks here and there as Harry spoke. But the truth was that the way he spoke about Louis, with a reverence in his voice that Louis had never heard twisted something in his gut. It was both welcoming and hard to accept at the same time. 

Anne kept looking at Louis with a soft look in her eye, and he could read that she approved of him, but he still wasn’t entirely sure why. Football was all he knew, really, it was the one thing he excelled at school, and being in the youth program he was basically surrounded by it as he grew up. When he wasn’t good enough to play pro, coaching just seemed like the next logical step, he wasn’t sure what else he had even been qualified for. 

Mosaic just came about when he got his first real paycheck and wanted to find a worthwhile charity. He stopped in one day to check it out and started talking to some people there, and the next thing he knew he was part of the staff. It’s not like he set out to be a paragon of nicety, he just happened to be really lucky. 

Somehow after explaining this to her, her face got inexplicably softer as she and Harry put the finishing touches on the roast before they put it in the oven. She left the kitchen to see if the rest of the family needed anything and gave Louis and Harry a moment of privacy. 

Harry took advantage of the moment and brought himself into Louis’ space, pulling him tight by putting his hands in Louis’ back pockets and crashing their bodies together. He peppered a few kisses around Louis’ face before planting another slow, deep kiss on his mouth. 

“What’s that for?” Louis questioned when he finally pulled away to catch his breath. 

Harry shrugged. “Just because.” He went in for another before Gemma walked in on them. 

“This again? Fuck, have you guys heard of a bedroom?” she asked with a smirk. 

Harry let out a laugh and Louis knew there was no bite behind her words. “Not sure it’d help with how loud this one gets,” Louis mostly joked as Harry blushed furiously. 

“Don’t remind me!” she groaned, “The things I’ve heard…” She cracked open another beer for each of them. 

Louis needed a subject change immediately. “You two are pretty close, huh?”

Harry’s eyes stayed on the beer twisting in his hands. “The LA place is… it’s more of a family house.” He shrugged, eyes still trained downward. “I get lonely.” 

“I can write anywhere,” Gemma continued with ease. “So as long as this one is paying for my flights, there’s no problem with me enjoying the California sun.”

“And Niall,” Louis coughed out under his hand. 

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” It was Gemma’s turn to avert her eyes. “He’s good company while this one is working.”

Harry gossiped enough that Louis knew there must be more to the story. But he was on his best behavior, so he wasn’t going to push it. 

Harry gave him the grand tour of the house that afternoon. The home was gorgeous, airy and spacious. Louis couldn’t take his eyes off this super-relaxed version of Harry. His eyes sparkled when he explained the moments behind the family photos on display. They sat under a tree in the garden and he laughed when talking about games they used to play as kids. 

His room was like all these layers of Harry piled on top of each other. Trophies and medals lined the bookshelf above the desk and there was a faded Take That poster hung on the closet door. The piles of books he had lying around ran the gamut from American classics like _The_ _Great Gatsby,_ to quick-read thrillers, and even some Doris Lessing. He’d have to pick Harry’s brain on good recommendations at some point. Louis picked up a dog-eared copy of _Tristram Shandy_. “Just some light reading?” 

Harry took it out of Louis’ hand, “I like to read, alright?”

Louis picked up on the defensiveness and immediately wanted to set him at ease. “I love a well-read man. Tristram is one of my favorites, actually. Quite funny, especially for when it was written.”

“Seriously? You’ve read it?”

Louis nodded and continued to look around the room, taking in the piles of expensive clothes tossed on the floor. 

He shrieked in surprise as Harry picked him up and threw him over his shoulder, walking the few steps to his bed, before tossing him on his back and climbing on top. Harry clasped Louis’ hands together above his head and held them with a single hand while the other clawed and rubbed over Louis chest while they were locked in a searing kiss. 

“What’s this? A literature kink?” Louis laughed. 

“Not funny,” Harry growled. “You are the sexiest person I have ever met and I don’t know how you keep surprising me.” He rucked Louis’ shirt up to his armpits and gave his nipples little bites and kisses, causing Louis to arch up to him. Harry had to release Louis’ hand as he continued south, sucking and nipping at Louis’ flat stomach. He inched Louis’ waistband down and gave his happy trail a series of kisses. Louis’ abs clenched and he seized the back of Harry’s neck. With a tiny lick of the sparse hair Harry changed direction, making his way to the sensitive skin at his collarbones. 

There was a quick rap on the door and then Mike walked in. “Jesus!” he exclaimed, “Glad I wasn’t sent up five minutes later.”

Harry glared from his position above Louis, “Don’t blame us, you’re the one just walking into my room.”

“No wonder Gemma refused to come up,” he murmured. “Tea’s ready.”

Harry rolled off Louis and kissed his forehead. . 

The weekend flew by; Louis got his fill of home cooking and managed to have a conversation with everyone without irreparably insulting anyone. Before they headed back to London the family invited Louis back and Anne pulled him aside to tell him that Harry was happy, which was all Louis could really ask for. There had been nothing to worry about after all. He had fit in as seamlessly with them as he did his own family, which just made him want to introduce them to Harry. 

▵▵▵

Louis brought Liam to hang out at Harry’s flat with him, Niall, Gemma. They were running about an hour late because the reality of actually going over to Harry’s flat sent Liam into a bit of a tailspin and he decided that he couldn’t do it. 

Louis tried to explain to Liam how he separated out the concepts of Harry StylesTM and Harry. There was nothing normal about the Harry he had gotten to know. He was a fighter, he was funny, and he was so passionate about his family and friends, art and music. It was the version of Harry StylesTM that Louis found to be ‘just.’ His public image was watered down and bland, actually. Louis found it ridiculous that anyone, least of all Liam, would be so nervous to meet Harry StylesTM. 

Even though he’d actually be meeting just Harry.

Liam rolled his eyes at Louis forgetting he had been in nearly the same state of panic not long ago. Louis finally got him out the door with a promise of a few rounds if Liam somehow made a total arse of himself.

They settled to a game of FIFA, Louis and Harry claiming to be the dream team while Niall and Liam held their own. Gemma sat between the boys, next to Niall and whispered encouraging things in his ear. 

A few twelve packs and a pizza or two later, Harry dragged a kitchen chair into the living room and stood up, towering over his guests. 

“Hey! Hazza! You’re already the tallest, no need to use the chair!” Louis ribbed.

Harry stuck his tongue out at Louis and dinged his beer bottle with one of his rings, even though he already had everyone’s attention. 

“I have an important announcement.”

Gemma shouted, “I’d hope so, with all this fanfare.”

“To quote the great Diana Ross, I’m coming out.” Harry broke into a grin as everyone cheered below him. Louis looked up at his boy and could not have been more proud of him than he was at that moment. “Tomorrow we’re doing the interview and photo spread, and soon you can read all about it at your local grocer’s check out.”

He climbed down to an awaiting group hug and lots of congratulations. “This calls for a celebration! I’ll go get another round!” Niall chimed in on his way to the kitchen. 

Harry pulled Louis in tight and whispered in his ear, “All thanks to you.”

“No way, Haz. I’m just lucky enough to witness it. You’re the one fighting.” They lost themselves in another kiss, something that was becoming commonplace with them, until Niall pried them apart with frosty cold beers.

▵▵▵

Harry woke up the next morning more hungover than he expected, and thanked the gods that makeup artists existed on days when he was sure to be bloated with bags under his eyes. He rolled over and nudged Louis who had agreed to tag along to the shoot. In the early light of the morning though, Harry wouldn’t have blamed him for having a bit of a lie in instead. 

But Louis squinted one eye open, then the other, finally focusing on Harry. “Big day, innit?” 

Harry agreed and moved to start getting ready. Since wardrobe and hair and makeup were provided, he just had to shave, brush his teeth, and throw on some fresh smelling clothes. Then he gave up the bathroom for Louis who was sure to have a more extensive routine, while he went down to make tea and a simple brekkie. 

The simple domesticity of it all made it a bit hard to breathe.

Liam was fast asleep on the sofa and Niall and Gemma were nowhere to be found. Niall and Gemma. He had already gotten used to thinking of them as one unit but wasn’t even sure if their _thing_ was official. He thought about waking Niall, but decided that between James and Louis being there with him, he probably didn’t need a PA. The message would be different this time, but there was nothing different about the logistics of a simple photoshoot and quick interview. 

He tried to keep the noise down as he got everything ready. Louis, who was normally a giant ball of uncontained, loud energy, slipped into the kitchen quietly and wrapped his arms around Harry’s waist. “You’re going to kill it, love.” 

Louis’ ministrations, how he always seemed to know what Harry needed at any moment, was astounding. The two of them left quietly and made their way to the shoot location in the cold morning air. 

▵▵▵

A weekend away was just what Harry needed. He knew the upcoming media hype over his coming out would be a lot, he knew that it was going to be a stressful time and hopefully people were going to be nice to him, but the stress of “what if” was hanging heavy over his head. He needed to do this, his personal life had been miserable most of his career because he had been shoved back in the closet, and now he’d get to be more honest with the world. He knew it was what he needed, but that still didn’t necessarily mean he was going to have a career to come back to. It’s possible that every naysayer was right and this was going affect his chances to ever work again, but if that happened at least he had a nice cushion of money and he could figure out what to do from there. 

So he was stressed (coming up with back-up plans for his back-up plans was never a forte of his) and he found himself spiraling down into the very worst what ifs that landed him homeless and hated by everyone he knew. 

After one too many conversations where Louis had to talk Harry down from the metaphorical ledge, he suggested that Harry get away for a bit, and Harry suggested that Louis come with him. Niall helped arrange a cottage in the middle of nowhere up north where they could be left alone. Harry tried to arrange it so that he didn't even need to bring a cell phone, but Niall, forever practical, told him he had to take it and text him once a day to make sure things were okay and they hadn’t been murdered in their sleep. But he could keep it turned off most of the time there so they could ignore the world. 

The road trip was uneventful, Louis ended up falling asleep moments after they merged onto the motorway and slept straight through until Harry drove down the long driveway and parked the car out front. 

“Oi! Why didn’t you wake me up?” Louis scowled. He was always cranky when he first woke up. 

Harry reached out a hand to run down the side of Louis’ face. “You were too cute, honestly. I’ve never seen you look so young and peaceful.”

“Harold!” Louis sputtered, “I’ll have you know that I am quite manly. You’ll never be able to prove otherwise.”

Harry picked up the mobile that had been lying in the center console and waved it in Louis’ direction. “Pictures disagree, dearest.”

The smile Louis tried to tamp down sent Harry’s heart skittering. Louis grabbed the phone from Harry’s hand. “I’ll delete them as soon as I investigate this lovely cottage.”

The wooden house was two stories and had a wrap-around porch placed in front of floor to ceiling glass windows that looked out on the woods surrounding them. The kitchen was a tiny portion of the great room that included a sitting space and a large table for meals. The living room had a vaulted ceiling that was the full two stories, and up a flight of stairs was a loft that looked down on the great room. Below the loft on the main floor was a huge bathroom that housed a shower and jacuzzi tub, and across from that was the master bedroom. 

Niall had ensured that the kitchen came fully stocked, so they set their bags in the bedroom and Harry made them a set of drinks. The house had only a tiny black and white television that received spotty service, but there was a cabinet full of board games. They pulled out Scrabble first, Harry easily winning the first round and Louis demanding a rematch. They didn’t make it through the whole game though, a bet over whether “vibey” was an approved word, led to a tickle fight that ended in a heavy make out session. 

They gasped into each other mouths, trying to pull in some oxygen before reattaching their lips. Louis’ hands ran down Harry’s torso, gently scratching his sides, and teasing his nipples before making the move to undo his belt. They were both hard, arching into each other, and even as Louis’ hand worked over the belt’s clasp, Harry could feel how much Louis wanted him. 

Harry was obsessed with Louis’ penis. It was the prettiest one he had ever seen: a perfect length and thick, the most gorgeous shade of pink that turned a dark crimson when Louis was leaking precome and begging for release from Harry’s hands. 

He had promised Louis that they could take things slow and he would never want to push Louis into anything he wasn’t comfortable with, but Harry was dying for the day when Louis would let him put his mouth on that beautiful dick. He woke up wet after dreams about that day. 

Louis finally freed Harry’s legs from his tight jeans and pulled his black boxer briefs down to his thighs as Harry fumbled at removing Louis’ clothing as well. Harry groaned when he got Louis’ trousers open and found that he wasn’t wearing pants at all. His cock slapped against his stomach and it took all of Harry’s willpower not to deepthroat it without warning. 

He did spit into his hand though, so he could start working it over with his hands. The lube was packed away somewhere and he couldn’t think of breaking away from this moment to go find it. Louis’ throaty moans were spurring Harry on, until Louis put a hand over Harry’s and slowed him to a stop. 

“Want your mouth,” Louis slurred against his shoulder. 

Harry took a moment to collect himself, just the thought of Louis allowing them to move forward almost caused him to come, and he had to take a tight grip of his base until the moment passed. 

In the few seconds Harry needed to compose himself, Louis’ face fell and he started to backpedal. “No pressure. I mean, only if you want. It’s okay, if, like, you don’t want⏤”

Harry shut him up with a searing kiss. 

“I can’t wait to taste you.” And with that he slid down Louis’ body, peppering kisses along his torso with the occasional bite or suck that was sure to bruise, until he hit the swell of his tiny belly and then finally placed a single kitten lick to the leaking slit. His own cock jumped when he tasted the salty slick. 

He fed the whole length of Louis’ cock into his mouth in one go. He licked from the base upwards, curling his tongue and feeling the weight of it, heavy, and reveled in the feel of it filling his mouth. He swirled his tongue against the head, and gave few hard pumps with this hand, before taking him down again. 

Louis moaned. “Jesus, Styles, you’re incredible.”

Louis’ positive reinforcement made Harry to want to make it even better for him. He opened his throat and swallowed around Louis’ head causing another stream of expletives from Louis. Harry nosed at the perfectly trimmed pubic hair and ran a finger across his taint. He worked him over again and again, jaw aching from giving pleasure, until he could feel the tightening of Louis’ balls, his whole body going rigid below him, and then finally Louis’ release, pulse after pulse of warm come sliding down Harry’s throat. Louis whimpered as he came down from his high. Harry looked up to see Louis flushed and breathing heavy, his chest rising and falling. One hand was still wrapped in his own hair and his eyes were slowly reopening after being tightly shut. 

Harry considered himself lucky to see Louis like this, completely unguarded and relaxed. Not only to see him, but to be the cause of it. He made the same trail back up Louis’ torso, and Louis was loose limbed by the time Harry laid a slow, deep kiss in his mouth. 

Louis pulled away the tiniest bit to talk into Harry’s mouth. “Mmm, let me.”

“Not now. Too gorgeous like this. Want to mark you up. Make you mine.” 

Louis nodded and tried to present his chest though Harry was still lying prone on top of him. Harry finally sat back on Louis’ thighs, and worked his hand over his own cock. It didn’t take much, a few strokes and watching Louis’ abs contract, and he was coming all over Louis’ chest, making a small puddle right above his belly button. 

“So messy,” Louis groaned. 

The smile on his face told Harry he didn’t mind.

Harry was mesmerized by it and idly dragged his finger into his mess, drawing a heart and then the letter H. His boyfriend was so—

Boyfriend? The thought took him by surprise. Despite wanting a family for as long as he could remember, he never had a specific person in mind to build that family with. But now the vision became a little clearer, he could fall in love with this man, this could be it for him. 

He tabled the conversation for when they weren’t laying on the floor, in need of a shower, and sticky with come. Instead he thought about wooing Louis a little harder, and what he could make for dinner that could subtly convince Louis to stick around past his contract. 

The rest of the weekend passed in a blur of eating and getting each other off, with a few board game related squabbles and a daily kick around in the fresh air. Harry couldn’t shake the thought that he didn’t want to share Louis, didn’t want anyone else to see his blissed face, to hear his whimpers, to wake up next to him, soft and disgruntled and absolutely perfect. 

▵▵▵

Harry had mentioned a few times wanting to come and see Mosaic. He wondered if he could go without any of the kids saying anything. Louis promised anonymity since anything that happened there stayed there, and they all knew the importance of not outing anyone. 

Louis waited patiently in the driver’s seat while Harry finished up the call with someone from his team. “I really do have to go now. We can finish this up later today.” Harry sounded exasperated, “I’m with Louis. We’ll call back when we’re done here.” Louis’ eyes widened, his team still didn’t know that they were spending time outside of their PR relationship together. Harry grimaced and mouthed _oops_ in Louis’ direction. “Yeah, sure, sure, that’s fine. Bye.”

“What was that about, then?” Louis asked after Harry ended the call. 

“Same old, they want to set up another ‘date’ for us.” Harry sighed. “It will be easier if you and Niall are on the call too, we can clear your calendar at the same time.”

“Did they care that we were… you know?” Louis asked. 

“They tried to act like they weren’t. I’m sure I’ll get a stern talking to later.”

Louis indicated Mosaic through the car window. “If they knew…” He didn’t want to think about what the team would say if they knew Harry was here.

The kids were shocked into submission when Louis and Harry walked in the door. They all stood, wide-eyed and frozen in place, until Harry broke the ice. “I hear I have you lot to thank for this one.” He pointed his thumb in Louis’ direction. 

The kids broke into smiles and cheers then, and the rest of the afternoon passed easily as they asked about life in Los Angeles, and what it was like being an actor. They also tried to fish for stories about their favorite celebrities. In return they shared stories of growing up and talked about school and how they hated revision. 

Their time was almost up when there was a knock on the door and Mike, the manager of the whole organization, snuck his head in and vigorously motioned for Louis to come into the hall with him. 

Louis followed him out, thinking he was angry about Harry coming, as he hadn’t actually cleared it. He didn’t even think about it until Mike’s red and furious face was directed at Louis. He started to apologize but Mike cut him off, as he grabbed Louis’ forearm and dragged him towards the front door. “I don’t want to hear excuses. Why the hell would you think this is acceptable?”

Stationed right outside the door were five paparazzi, who all raised their cameras as Louis walked towards them. “What the fuck?” They were all clicking away at the facade and Louis could hear them, even through the door, asking about Harry between snaps. 

What the actual fuck.

He dragged Mike back to where they had come from, asking Harry to come out in the hallway with them. “Paps are out front,” he muttered before they both turned back to Mike. 

Harry’s jaw literally dropped. “What the fuck?”

Louis was baffled. “Mike, I promise you, no one knew we were coming. No one.”

Harry put out his hand to Mike to shake. “Sorry about this. I have no idea how this happened, but I’ll put an end to it immediately.”

Harry took a step away and made a series of short, irate phone calls. Louis guessed it was his security first, then a few calls to people on his team. He turned back in a few minutes and apologized again, promising that they’d be gone as quick as possible. 

“No one owned up to it, but James promised me he’d call them off. They’ll have to tell them they were wrong about us being here.”

Less than fifteen minutes later, the paps had dispersed. Raul showed up moments later but he still picked Harry and Louis up from the back alley, in case any of the paps had just moved to a location a little less obvious. 

On the ride back to Louis’ flat, Harry stared out the window with fire in his eyes. Louis had never seen him so angry and knew without asking that Harry was just as blindsided as everyone else. 

Louis tapped his wrist. “Can I—”

“Fuck! No. You can’t _do_ anything.”

Louis huffed out a frustrated breath. They weren’t going to be able to have a rational conversation until Harry calmed the fuck down. 

When they got back to the loft, Harry made a beeline to Louis’ bedroom and slammed the door so hard the frame rattled. 

Louis set about making tea and pulling out ingredients needed for some cheese toasties. He could hear the odd word from Harry and knew that he was still angry. Louis wasn’t sure what he could do to calm him down when he came back out. Louis was angry as well, of course, it was a gross invasion of privacy, and he was glad that Harry was giving the people responsible a reaming out. But at the end of the day, no actual harm was done, the windows at the center were blacked out so pictures wouldn’t show anyone inside and Mike said the receptionist had stopped anyone from going out as soon as they showed up. 

He was going to have to find a way to apologize to Mike again. He had gotten so used to hanging out with just Harry that it was easy to forgot that he also existed as Harry StylesTM. He thought they had covered all potential issues of Harry showing up there. But Louis honestly hadn’t considered at all that paparazzi would show up, because to him it was unimaginable that they’d go through such disgusting lengths. 

The toasties were cooling off and starting to congeal when Harry emerged. He listlessly and silently took a few bites until he finally looked at Louis in the eye, immediately breaking into tears. 

Louis moved around to the other side of the table and sat himself down on Harry’s lap, pulling him tight so Harry was crying on his shoulder. 

“It’s so fucked up and I can’t believe that they would be so vile. I don’t blame you at all if you want out immediately.” Harry managed to get out between his sobs. 

“I don’t blame you. It’s fucked up, of course, but I don’t blame you.” Louis ran his fingers through Harry’s curls. “Let’s make it an early night; I’m worn out. We can talk about it in the morning.”

Louis’ words prompted another round of sobs. “You’re too good.”

Louis laughed at that. “I’m sure I can find plenty of people who would disagree with you on that, love.” He tilted Harry’s face up with a finger under his chin. “We have some _Project Runway_ to binge watch.” He planted a chaste kiss on Harry’s lips. 

Louis had a fitful night of sleep, despite Harry curled up next to him. He figured Harry was getting just as little sleep as he was, since every time he woke up Harry was fidgeting next to him. He finally gave up on getting decent sleep when the sky started turning the tiniest pink hue. 

He climbed out of bed and walked directly into the shower, waiting until steam was billowing from the top before he got in. The water was painful, hotter than he was used to, and he absentmindedly thought that he’d have to add more moisturizer than normal to his routine when he got out. His mind kept wandering back to the previous day and what he had gotten himself into. 

He knew, objectively, that he’d have to give up a bit of his privacy if he and Harry decided to stay together. He thought he’d be able to handle the snarky comments on his fashion choices on red carpets, he was still patting himself on the back for his ability to stay away from the comments on the online stories. And he figured an occasional paparazzi-filled afternoon would occur when Harry was in promotion mode, which he had almost gotten used to. 

But he really didn’t expect Harry’s fans to be so devoted to pulling out every detail from his life that had been published on the internet and bringing them together in one collection to make assumptions about whether or not he was good guy. 

He also did not expect that the teens he mentored, either at Mosaic or on the pitch, would be affected. He didn’t think his family would be tracked down on social media. He tried to weigh what he could handle versus how much he cared for Harry. 

He wondered how different it would be once Harry came out, if the interest in him would grow as Harry’s partner, or if after the initial announcement interest would die down because he really led an uninteresting life. 

He was still going over all the pros and cons of continuing with Harry as he finished up his bathroom routine. He left the bathroom, towel tied tightly around his waist, and found Harry sitting naked on his bed, looking like he hadn’t slept at all. 

Seeing Harry so beaten down made Louis want to fight for them. And also made him want to fight for Harry in general, to get better treatment from his team. He looked so guilty for something that was not his fault at all, but the fault of some arsehole on his team who didn’t care to think about how upsetting it would be for pictures to be taken at a location that prided itself on safety. He had seen Harry’s passion for acting, the way he picked apart movies as they watched them, the passion in his voice when he spoke about his favorite films and what they meant to him. The differences between those films and the films that he was actually cast in were astronomical. 

Louis decided then that if Harry was willing to fight, he’d be there at his side, fighting with him. He took a deep breath before saying, “Harry, you need a new team.”


	9. Chapter 9

The loud din at the restaurant where they were having dinner made it hard for Louis to hear anyone sat at the other end of the table. Luckily, that meant he got to focus on the very handsome man across from him. Harry had been playing footsies all night and as the dinner wore on he’d occasionally raise a socked foot towards Louis’ groin. 

Gemma was next to Louis, but she seemed to discretely argue with Niall, sat beside her, most of the night. Across from them were Robin and Anne, and further down were Robin’s kids. 

The dinner was delicious, and they were getting to the part of the meal where they were pushing their plates slightly away and moaning about how full they were. They all had their fair share of drinks; Louis was just finishing his third glass of wine and Harry prompted him to go ahead and order another. Louis tried to stop Harry from obnoxiously flagging down the waiter for him when there was a commotion in the middle of the table.

Gemma stood and clinked her glass, drawing the table’s attention towards her before she quickly sat back down. She glanced at Niall quickly. “We have an announcement.”

“Who has an announcement, dear?” Anne asked. 

Gemma side-eyed Niall, but he just looked wide eyed and scared until she elbowed him and he finally chimed in, “Uh, Gemma and I, we have the announcement.” He didn’t continue though, and the table sat silent for a few moments. 

Louis saw it out of the corner of his eye, one extra piece of jewelry adorning her multi-ringed fingers, and barely held in a gasp, just as Robin prodded, “Go on then.”

Gemma and Niall continued to look at each other, apparently having a full conversation with their eyes, before Gemma finally lifted her left hand. “We’re engaged!” Her inflection made it seem like much more of a question than a statement. The whole table was quiet, smiles frozen on their faces, as they tried to process what she said. Niall looked like he honestly wanted to disappear into the floor. Anne was rapidly looking back and forth between him and Gemma, as if trying to suss out if it was a joke. 

Louis, having a second longer than everyone one to process what was happening, was the first to break the silence. “Congrats! This probably calls for another round of drinks for everyone!” 

As he ended his sentence everyone else at the table jumped in with their congratulations, as well as multiple requests to fill everyone on their relationship, since no one even knew they were officially dating. As there were hugs and handshakes made across the table, Louis was able to flag down the waiter and ask for a several bottles of champagne for the table. 

Harry’s smile was plastered on his face, dimples on full display, as he looked between them in disbelief. He kept repeating, “You fuckers. Can’t believe you kept this from me.” 

Louis kept catching Harry’s eye and with the constant biting of his lower lip, Louis knew he was somehow turned on by the unexpected turn of events. 

Niall tried to placate the table by giving up why they hadn’t told anyone. “It was super casual at first, hanging out while Haz was on set. And we kept it quiet because he would always hint, you’re not subtle by the way.”

“Wasn’t trying to be, mate! Clearly, I was right!”

“Yeah. Yeah. It was a fun hiding it from you, but also if you knew, it’d be, like, _real_ , and we wanted to avoid that pressure for a while. Because if it didn’t work out it could’ve been a disaster.”

“When’d it get serious?” Robin asked. 

“Looking back, I think it was _it_ from the beginning. She’s… the best. I’d be a fool to give her up.”

“And then,” Gemma jumped in, “it seemed like there was always something going on, no good time to break the news since it had been going on so long.” She gave an apologetic look down the table.

“But once I put a ring on it, she made me come clean. So, here we are!” 

Gemma was highly amused watching Niall trying to tell the story of how he proposed to her entire family. Louis caught her attention with a little knee bump. “You can be honest with me: is this a shotgun wedding?”

“Cheeky git. You can fuck right off. Do I look pregnant?”

“You look stunning actually, properly glowing with happiness.” 

She pulled him in for a tight hug. As they were easing away she whispered in his ear, “Reckon it’s going to be you two next.” 

He wanted to argue, but she had turned back to the rest of the table after a little wiggle of her eyebrows, so he downed his glass before focusing on Harry. He had an odd smile on his face, scrunching his nose as if to hold in all the happiness that was threatening to spill on his face. 

By the time the drinks were all finished and everyone was given satisfactory answers to their questions, they piled out of the table and separated at the front door, either to the tube or the car park. Louis and Harry climbed into the awaiting Uber and headed back to Harry’s. 

In the car, Louis was struck by thoughts that kept pinballing around in his brain. The first was no one had given Harry a second look. Through the dinner, and the ensuing excitement that came over the table, they hadn’t been bothered once with fans asking for selfies or to have him sign things. Louis had not experienced this pseudo-public side of Harry; either they were on well-publicized dates or they had quiet nights in. They were out and unrecognized and not once was Louis’ attention drawn away from the dinner wondering if someone was going to take their picture.

It felt like a regular family dinner. Louis couldn’t stop smiling about that realization. Knowing that there was the possibility of a middle ground, that they could spend entire nights together out without being bothered, lifted a major weight off his shoulders. 

But also, it was Harry’s family and Louis felt right at home with the lot of them. He loved how they welcomed him with open arms and trusted that he was good for Harry. He fit easily into their lives. 

The other thought was how Harry apparently had a domesticity kink, which was clearly present when Louis vaguely asked him if he’d want to settle down someday. Harry confessed to wanting the white picket fence fantasy that included a loving husband, a brood of kids, a few pets, dancing in the kitchen while making breakfast, bowls of popcorn for movie night, and crayon drawings on the fridge. He slid closer to Louis, seat belt unsnapped, as he tried to draw him into lingering kisses as he described what he wanted his future to look like. Louis put an end to it when he reminded Harry he wouldn’t have any of that if he wasn’t wearing a seatbelt if they crashed. 

They drunkenly stumbled into the flat and headed straight to the bedroom to strip out of their clothes and fall into bed. “I hope they have kids right away. I hope they have six kids that I’ll get to spoil,” Harry muttered. 

“Mmmm, maybe give them some time, love,” Louis responded. 

“I want a baby.”

Louis laughed, “Oh, really?”

“I want a baby now.” Harry stuck out his bottom lip in a pout. 

“Not sure you do, actually.” Louis rolled his eyes at Harry’s dramatics. “Some day you’ll get it all. Tonight you’re getting sleep.”

Harry’s eyes were already closing as he kept talking. “Tonight you should put a baby in me.”

Louis curled up behind Harry and wrapped an arm across his chest. Louis knew he had already fallen asleep by his steady breathing, and he held him close. He fell asleep right after, and had vague, brightly colored dreams about kids, parks, and gorgeous green eyes that were in every scene. 

▵▵▵

Louis woke up snuggled against Harry’s chest. As he was trying to open his eyes and wake himself from his slumber, he idly ran his fingers through Harry’s sparse chest hair. His morning wood was trapped against Harry’s thigh and he gently rutted a few times against the firm muscles. They had talked about the possibility of ‘butt stuff’, as Louis had taken to calling it, and in early morning haze Louis played his own version of She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not with each rock of his hips _today, not today, today, not today, today_ alternated in his head. 

Harry started to stir next to him and Louis finally peeked at him. Harry slowly extracted an arm from around Louis and brought it downward, handling Louis’ cock softly. He worked over it at an unnaturally slow pace and barely gripped hard enough to get any friction at all. It was definitely Louis’ favorite way to wake up. There was no rush, they had the whole day to themselves before a scheduled dinner that night, but for now there was nothing on Louis’ mind but the feeling between his legs. 

He didn’t know how long they had been at it, it’s possible his mind had shut down or he momentarily fell back asleep, but suddenly the tender touches that he’d been receiving all morning caught up with him. He looked over at Harry, who was looking at him with such undivided attention and softness that Louis’ heart swelled and his balls finally released. His orgasm took him by surprise with both the force by which he came and that he and Harry had managed to maintain eye contact through the whole thing. Instead of feeling vulnerable, Louis felt relaxed and, well, loved. 

He knew, logically, that it was too early for saying that word, that he needed to refrain from using it outloud but with all the tenderness Harry showed him that morning, he _knew_ Harry felt the same as he did. 

After a few minutes of kissing, Louis made up his mind. “How about I help you out with this,” he brought his thigh up and applied significant pressure to Harry’s rock hard cock, “in the shower? Then we come back to bed and you open me up on these gorgeous fingers before fucking me?”

Harry pulled his head just far enough away that Louis could see his whole face. 

“Are you sure?” Harry swiped an errant hair from Louis’ forehead. “I don’t want you to⏤”

“I’m really sure.” Louis interrupted. “At least... want to try.”

Harry leapt out of bed, dragging Louis to the bathroom. “Then that’s the best plan I’ve ever heard in my entire life.”

Harry scrubbed Louis from shoulders to toes with the green Hermes shower gel that smelled like oranges. “Really, Harold.” Louis rolled his eyes. “Aren’t there better things to spend your money on?”

“Heeeey,” Harry drawled, “it smells amazing.”

“Can’t argue with that.”

Harry wiggled his eyebrows at Louis. “Also, got it free in some swag bag.” 

Their banter was cut short when Harry swiped a finger down Louis’ crack. “Mind if I get you squeaky clean, darling?” Harry whispered behind Louis’ ear. 

Louis arched his back and stuck his arse out in response. He finally whined out a please when Harry’s finger circled his rim, and then Harry’s finger was sliding in. Just as Louis was about to beg for a second one, Harry pulled it out. “I seem to remember that part of the plan was getting me off.” 

Louis spun and dropped to his knees in one fluid motion, his face now level with Harry’s impressive penis. “Maybe I should tease you right back.” It twitched as Louis moved closer and Harry let out a loud exhale. 

Louis loved blowing Harry. He loved the weight of it in his mouth, the stretch that proved he didn’t mind working for it, but most of all he loved when Harry’s knees buckled moments after he finished coming, his body so flushed with pleasure that simply standing proved to be too much. 

He could feel Harry adjusting the shower head above him and moments later the water was coming out in a massaging pattern on his back. He took Harry even deeper and worked his tongue over him as he dragged his mouth up and down. He knew it wasn’t going to take long—Harry had been hard all morning—and shower head was his absolute favorite. A few more licks at the leaking slit and Louis knew that he was just on the edge of coming. He pulled off then, causing a strained whimper from above, but he started jacking Harry off centimeters from his face. Once Harry connected the dots he came hard, moaning obscenely. Louis looked up at him, face covered in Harry’s spunk, and blew him a kiss. 

Louis stood up, but before he could wash his face, Harry cupped his chin with one hand. With the other he cleaned up his mess, slowly, and carefully feeding it to Louis, one finger at a time. 

When he finished he gave Louis’ arse a soft spank. “Let’s go back to bed.”

They toweled off quickly, then stripped the bed of the duvet before climbing back on. “You sure about this, baby?” Harry asked. 

Louis caught his mouth in a deep kiss before answering. “I’m all in if you are.” It wasn’t the answer to the exact question he had been asked, but it was true. He was ready to be intimately close with Harry. He wanted to feel Harry inside of him. And he wasn’t going to let Harry go anytime soon. 

Harry led him up to the head of the bed, and fluffed some pillows around him, before taking an extra one from the pile and sliding it under Louis’ hips. He leaned over and pulled a few flavored lubes along with one unflavored, and a string of condoms, from the drawer. 

Louis cocked an eyebrow. “Someone’s confident.”

“Mmm, nowhere to be for hours and hours. Let’s see how many times I can get you off.” 

Louis picked up the plain lube. “Let’s start easy, cowboy, work up to the,” he chose another bottle at random, “mango pineapple.” He let out a laugh at the unexpected flavor. “I’m going to have to try that one.”

Harry opened the bottle and liberally coated his fingers. Louis let out the deep breath that he was holding and then Harry circled Louis’ rim until everything was slick. Harry pushed the tip of his middle finger in but stopped almost immediately. Louis wondered if he even got to the first knuckle.

Harry popped his head up from between Louis’ open thighs. “You okay?” 

“I promise to tell you if it’s too much.”

“Promise?”

“Promise. I swear.”

The rest of the finger slid in with only minimal effort and after a minute or so of the slow drag in and out he added more lube then a second finger. Harry started to slowly scissor him open. Louis fisted the sheets at the sensation. 

The gentle probe was still a lot; he felt exposed and vulnerable, but there was something about recognizing it and being okay with it that helped him breathe through it. He trusted Harry to take care of him, that relaxed him a bit. Every time he remembered it was just Harry, he let out a deep breath. 

“That’s it, darling.” Harry’s voice was thick from between his legs. He was also kissing up and down Louis’ thighs, a welcome distraction from the stretch, and Louis knew he was going to come away with more than one prominent bruise on his inner thigh.

Just as Louis was wondering if Harry was actually planning on taking the whole day to open him up, Harry added a third finger, watching Louis’ reaction to make sure it wasn’t too much. 

“Jesus, is there anything you do fast?”

“Just Harry, please. And I like to savor momentous things, thank you very much.”

Louis was trying to cover up the grin he couldn’t quite contain when Harry finally rubbed against his prostrate and his mouth fell open with a high moan. 

“Fuck, there, again, please.” He finally got the words out, as Harry moved his fingers back to the spot and circled it with some pressure. He focused on Louis’ prostrate once he found it, still able to stretch Louis open while stimulating it until Louis finally managed to string some words together and indicate to Harry that he was going to come if Harry didn’t stop. 

Harry pulled his fingers out and left Louis clenching against nothing, a stream of curses leaving his mouth. 

“Still sure you’re ready?” Harry asked. 

Louis knew that Harry’s commitment to ensuring consent was mostly endearing, but the whole experience was so different than the previous times he had tried that he was going to scream if he didn’t get Harry’s cock in his arse immediately. He had never _wanted_ so much.

Harry smirked at him, until he tried to open the condom, then his face fell to defeat as the foil bested him. Fingers slick with lube, Harry handed the condom packet over to Louis with a laugh, who slowly rolled it over Harry’s length. 

Once they had both settled back in their positions, Harry poised to enter Louis, he looked up again to confirm with Louis. 

“Get on with it, you arsehole!” Louis shouted in frustration. 

They both laughed as Harry pushed the tip in, and then they were breathing deeply as Harry tried to keep himself from coming just from Louis’ tight body and Louis was relaxing into the intrusion. 

It was so much. 

Louis was stretched to the point of pain, but tried to breathe through it as Harry slowly pushed his way inside. More than once they had to stop and compose themselves. 

“So tight. Not going to come.” Harry gritted out. 

Louis, overwhelmed by the way Harry was looking at him, like _he_ was the lucky one, occasionally gently ran his finger down where they were connected, where Harry was driving into Louis’ body, and his breath hitched. 

Once Harry was fully in, balls to arse, he waited a few moments before making eye contact with Louis again. “Ready?”

“Yeah.”

“You sure?”

It was a lot, there was so much pressure, but he was feeling surprisingly okay with it and once he was used to the feeling, he just wanted Harry to pull out and slam back in, suddenly he wanted this more than he had ever wanted anything and the slow drag of Harry’s cock in him again and again was all he could think about. 

Louis nodded again. “Holy fuck, dude. Get on with it.”

Harry’s eyes widened and he started to laugh again. “Sorry. Sorry.” He tried to get himself under control. “I can’t actually perform if you’re calling me dude in bed.”

Louis rolled his eyes and groaned. “Okay, light of my life, most perfect boyfriend, my gorgeous baby, can we please get on with it??”

“Are we officially boyfriends? Can we please be boyfriends?”

“Harry, I swear to God, we will have this conversation when we’re done. Right now I want you to make me come so hard I see fireworks. Move!” 

Harry’s face lit up as he rocked backwards then slammed back into Louis. Between the moans and grunts and expletives Louis tried to convey how perfect it was; how no sex he’d ever had made him feel so lightweight and grounded at the same time, which didn’t even make sense. He had never felt so close to someone before. 

Louis wanted to do this with him forever. 

Louis couldn’t tell if Harry was spectacularly perceptive and purposefully edging him or if it was happening by chance, but every time Louis came close, Harry hitting his prostate over and over again, he’d change it up and slow down a bit or change the angle, starving off the desperation that was coming in waves. Louis had never felt less in control, but Harry was so skillful, so thoughtful in his fucking—how was this his first time—that he didn’t even mind. He arched into it, dragging his nails down Harry’s back and kneading his flexing arse. 

The only thing he could focus on was Harry’s rhythm and the absolute pleasure that was thrumming through his body. 

Just as Louis had gotten used to being coaxed back from the edge, Harry started to move faster and faster, clutching Louis’ thighs, and digging his fingers into his skin so hard it hurt. Louis loved that the bruises would prove this moment wasn’t just a fantasy. 

A series of words, _harder—faster—baby—faster—god—harder—good—good—fuck—harder_ quickly swirled around him and he realized they were his; that he was practically shouting as he hurtled closer to his orgasm. 

Harry adjusted himself slightly to swipe Louis’ sweaty fringe across his forehead, a move he had seen Louis do himself a hundred times, and when he pounded back into Louis, eyes burning into each other, Louis’ whole body finally tensed as he arched up to meet Harry’s lips in a messy kiss that was more like gasping into each other mouths. He came hard, shooting ropes of come up their chests, as he clenched tightly around Harry. He could feel Harry come right after, shooting into the condom and moaning into Louis’ mouth. 

As they came down from their highs and Harry gently pulled out, they could do little more than cling tightly to each other, not yet ready to give up the full body contact. 

“Ten out of ten. Would do again,” Louis finally joked. 

“Sorry what was that? I think someone broke my eardrums.” Harry hid his huge smile by planting more kisses over any inch of Louis’ caramel skin that he could find. 

After a few more minutes they began to disengage body parts from each other, and Harry finally grabbed some baby wipes from the nightstand drawer. 

“Would get you a flannel, but need to feel my legs again first,” he managed to say as he started to wipe Louis down. 

“I’ll allow it just this once.”

“So, do you want to do this again sometime?”

Louis pushed a finger into Harry’s cocky dimple. “Is your hearing back? I repeat ten out of ten. Would do again. But I might need a few days to recover.”

“So boyfriends?” Harry asked hopefully. 

“Yeah, boyfriends.” Louis ran a finger down the length of Harry’s nose, then bopped the end, before bringing him into yet another kiss. “Not sharing you.”

By the time they left the bed hours later their lips were swollen and Louis knew he’d have to keep his waddle under control that night around the cameras. It was one thing for the world to know he was gay, it was quite another to show just how much he liked it up the arse. 

▵▵▵

None of Louis’ normal tricks were working on Harry’s thrumming nerves. He had tried to divert his attention with video games, reading scripts, going for a run, and even sex. Harry just couldn’t focus on any of it, and had snapped at Louis more times than he could count. 

He was trying not to get frustrated with him. He knew it was a big day, but he wasn’t exactly a joy to be around. Louis finally gave up and popped a bowl of popcorn for them to share as they put on a movie they had both seen a hundred times. 

The story would drop at five o’clock when the online article was released. There would be some tweets, both from the magazine and from Harry’s account, and also from a handful of his previous beards, congratulating their good friend. The print version in the magazine wouldn’t be on the shelves until the following day, but anyone with internet would find out the truth earlier. 

Harry was officially out of the closet.

Harry had been excited, overjoyed even, about it until the day actually arrived. Now he was a right mess and consumed by the fear that everything would be over for him. And Louis had to deal with him.

Knowing the answer, Louis asked, “Do you regret it? If you could, would you go back and allow your team to keep you in the closet?”

Harry looked over at him from across the sofa, their legs tangled in the middle. “No. I know that was the worst thing I could experience. I’ve been out to everyone in my life that really matters for years. It was almost daily shame that I had to hide this part of me at the best of times and pretend to be something I’m not at the worst.” Louis climbed over the sofa and straddled his lap, legs splayed to either side of Harry’s thighs, and clasped Harry’s hands in his. “Still scary though.” 

Louis placed a gentle kiss on his forehead. “You’re so brave.”

Harry let his head fall back against the sofa and closed his eyes. “Doesn’t feel like it.”

The movie kept playing, and finally Louis started a popcorn fight to distract them. Both of their phones were turned off, as they had given themselves strict instructions not to check any sort of social media for at least forty-eight hours. 

The clock turned five and the flat stood still around them. Even though Harry had relaxed somewhat, he still wasn’t quite himself. 

He had purchased a burner phone that Niall and Gemma, and his parents, had the number to, and other than that, he was ignoring the world. The phone sat silently on the table as the movie played. Louis wasn’t sure if that was a good sign or not, maybe they would only call if Harry needed to be warned before coming back into the public eye.

When the movie ended they went out to the terrace and smoked a cigarette while they looked over the city. 

Harry finally started laughing, a deep belly laugh, that had him keeling over in his chair. “Everyone else is just going on about their day.”

Louis winked at him. “Yep. You’re not the center of everyone’s universe.”

They moved back inside, the mood lifted considerably, and found the phone buzzing on the glass table. Harry swooped it up and moved into the bedroom in one smooth motion. Louis sat back on the sofa and bit his fingernails, nervous about what they were talking about. He could just make out Harry’s deep voice, but not the words he was saying. He needed to brew some tea instead of just sitting around trying not to strain to hear what was going on. 

“Sorry about that,” Harry wrapped his strong arms around Louis’ torso and kissed the back of his head when he came back to the kitchen. 

“No need to apologize, love. Everything okay?” He twisted himself around without jostling too much, not wanting to leave the confines of Harry’s arms even if he wanted to be face to face. 

“Yeah, that was just my mum. Just wanted to tell me how proud of me she was.” Harry let out a tiny hiccuping cry. “It’s so stupid, I never doubted it, but I’m still really happy she called.”

“A+ mum-ing on her part.”

“Always. She said the same thing you did.”

Louis pulled him down into a chaste kiss. He couldn’t get enough of those plump lips, even when in the middle of a serious conversation. “What’s that?”

“That I needed a new team. I told her the good news that I had already started looking.”

“Think you better get used to your mum and I ganging up on you.”

Their next kiss was interrupted by the phone ringing again. 

“Weird, I don’t know this number…” Harry looked confused at the burner phone, then answered it anyway, again retreating to the bedroom. 

This time Harry came out with his face beaming like the sun itself, his dimples on full display and eyes shining. He crowded Louis up against the fridge, drawing him into a deep kiss, one arm tight around his waist, keeping their bodies flush, the other hand at the side of his neck, thumb rubbing up and down his jawline. 

He finally pulled away, ending their impromptu makeout session with a few pecks to Louis’ spit wet lips. “Champagne, this calls for champagne.”

“That must’ve been some call.”

“That was Christopher Nolan.”

“Wait, what?” Louis giggled from a mix of excitement and confusion. 

“I’ve been auditioning for this role. I had like six call backs, and I had actually given up hope since I hadn’t heard from them for a while, but I got it. Niall, bless his heart, gave him this number. Fuck, Louis, I’m going to be in a Christopher Nolan film. This is like… I can’t feel my legs… I’m shaking.”

Louis grasped Harry’s hands that were indeed shaking into his own smaller hands. His heart was so full, he was so happy for his boy, so overjoyed that it had turned out so differently than Harry’s worst fears, so proud that Harry was being seen for the tremendous actor that he really was, and so lucky that he got to be here with him, right by his side. 


	10. Chapter 10

Harry stood in the same spot where he had watched most of the final game. His gaze was focused on Louis as he coached the academy team. He enthusiastically ran up and down the sidelines and shouted out nothing but encouragement. Even when they were down a goal, Louis radiated positivity towards his team; Harry found it endlessly endearing. 

The final whistle blew and Louis’ team leapt in the air, piling on top of each other in a heap as they fell in celebration. The players clearly wanted Louis to celebrate with them and brought him into their huddle. Chelsea’s team stood around dejectedly for a bit, the defeat and regret written on their faces was a clear contrast to the whooping smiles and full body excitement that ran through the winning team.

Finally both teams traipsed into the locker rooms and Harry couldn’t help but notice the positive encouragement Louis gave a few members of the opposing team too, calling out specific plays they had made or fancy footwork he had seen. It was possible that Louis was the nicest person that Harry had ever met. 

As the away team filed into their bus to go back across London, Louis’ team started trickling out into the back halls of Emirates where they were met by friends and family. Harry tried to stay away, hidden in the background as much as possible. It was a thin line, not being the creepy guy hiding in the shadows, but he also didn’t want to go striding into the locker room and call attention to himself. 

Just as he was about to leave and simply send Louis a text asking about later tonight, he saw him emerge from the locker room. Harry made an easy jog over to him, and pulled him into a small alcove, catching him before he was surrounded by parents. 

“I want to celebrate.” Harry pushed him against wall, before planting a smacking kiss on his cheek. “I’m so very proud of you.”

“We’re all going to head down to the pub. You’re invited.” Louis’ eyes sparkled. 

Harry took a look around at all the kids celebrating, adrenaline still coursing through their veins. A couple of them had turned their attention to him and Louis standing to the side. “I really don’t want to draw any attention, and with how good you look, I know we’d be sure to cause some heads to turn. The kids deserve all the attention.” 

He brought Louis in to kiss his temple. “How about... I go back to mine and get a private celebration ready? You take your time with everyone, and then come over when you’re ready?”

Harry knew it was an offer Louis couldn’t refuse. 

▵▵▵

The door buzzed as Louis entered the lobby and said hello to the doorman. Louis thought that one day he might get used to all of this, but it surprised him every time he was reminded just how famous Harry actually was.

When the elevator doors slid open into Harry’s apartment, Louis was taken aback by the dimmed lights and flickering candles scattered throughout the flat. He could hear some movement in the kitchen so he headed in that direction after slipping off his shoes. He turned the corner and the sight in front of him caused him to swallow the wrong way resulting in a coughing fit. 

Harry, dressed only in skimpy lace underwear that didn’t even fully cover his soft cock, and black thigh high stockings, rushed over to Louis’ side with panic in his eyes. Louis tried to catch his breath between hacking coughs and welling tears, as Harry patted his back gently and tried to get him to raise his arms above his head. 

As soon as he was able to get one solid lungful of air he noticed how flushed Harry had grown. Harry bit his lip and looked embarrassed. “Too much? If you hate it I can—“

Louis cut him off. “Styles,” he exhaled, “You look…” He swallowed, not even sure what words could fully express how Harry looked. “God, you’re gorgeous.” He stepped into Harry’s space, trailing a single finger from the top of his stocking, over the lace sitting low on his hips, then slowly up his chest, circling his nipple. “Most beautiful man I’ve ever seen.”

He pulled Harry’s head down a bit and nipped the top of his shoulder, mouthing a line to the crook of his neck, then licked and sucked along the dusting of stubble on his jawline. Before he pulled him into a deep kiss, Louis whispered, “If you don’t want me to keel over and die from arousal next time, you should give a guy some warning.”

After a few short minutes of kissing, Harry untangled his fingers from the long curls at Louis’ neck. He pulled away to hold Louis’ hand while they crossed the kitchen to the spread of champagne and strawberries on the counter. “What’s a celebration without a little bubbly?” Harry asked rhetorically while handing a flute over. 

They clinked glasses and Harry once again told Louis how proud he was, how he knew the team had worked so hard to finally win the league championship. 

“If I had known this was my reward I would’ve worked the team so much harder.” Louis gave Harry’s long body another lascivious look. “When do I get my trophy?” 

“Oh, no, that’s not how the night is going to go at all,” Harry teased. “First, we need to get you out of these clothes and into the tub.” 

Harry’s eyes widened comically as he turned and half-ran, half-skidded down the hall. Louis picked up both champagne flutes and the bottle and followed the scantily clad man in confusion. 

Harry was bent over the tub, arse on display, as he quickly turned the knobs to stop the flow of water into the massive pile of bubbles that now filled the bathtub and threatened to overflow onto the floor. He pivoted and sat on the edge of the tub, shaking his head. “So far none of this is going as planned.”

Louis laughed in the darkened room, again the only light source being a row of candles across the lid of the toilet and another row on the vanity. “Still pretty incredible. Can’t believe you did all this for me.”

“Want to pamper you.”

“Mmm, then I should get out of these sweaty clothes and into that slice of heaven.”

Harry had already moved to start slowly unbuttoning Louis’ shirt, leaving kisses down his chest as it became more exposed. The shirt fluttered to the ground and Louis stood, emptying his champagne, as Harry worked on his trousers. They slid down his muscular legs and he easily stepped out of them. Harry pulled Louis’ socks off his feet with a teasing tickle along the base of his foot. Harry then hooked his fingers over Louis’ boxer briefs and shuffled them down his legs. Louis’ hard cock thumped against his stomach when it was freed and Harry licked a long stripe to the top before kissing the head. Louis stepped into the tub with Harry’s help, then was handed a champagne refill as he sunk down into the warm, relaxing water. 

“Gonna join me?”

Harry shook his head. “Showered before you came over. Want you to stretch out and relax. Could give you a bit of a massage if you wanted, though.” 

Harry’s fingers dug along Louis’ shoulder blades, and he worked his way around, loosening knots as he found them, eliciting whines of pain and pleasure from Louis, head tilted back, eyes closed. Once he had worked them all loose, he placed a kiss to the top of Louis’ head and reached under the sink to find a flannel he could use to scrub the rest of Louis. He dunked the flannel and started to wipe Louis down until he gently protested. “I can do this, you just sit over there and look pretty.”

Harry didn’t put up a fight, instead toweled his arms off, then boosted himself to sit on the vanity. 

“Your team played so well today. I’m so proud of you.”

Louis hummed. He relaxed in the warm water and his voice was slow when he finally spoke. “Perfect timing, really, with your article coming out before the match. I think coming out to the team made them play better; honesty, trustworthiness, all that shit. They actually played like a tight-knit team tonight. I’m so proud of them for continuing to fight.”

“Should be proud of yourself too, love. First gay coach to win a championship.”

Louis rolled his eyes. “I’m sure there’ve been gay coaches before. Just didn’t know.”

Harry rolled his eyes right back. “Well, first _out_ gay coach. Still a big accomplishment.”

Louis adjusted himself in the tub, causing a wave of water to overflow as he rolled his neck and shoulders. He looked up suddenly, his mouth in an _O_. “Forgot to ask, how’d the meeting with the new agent go?”

“You had good reason. And the meeting was great, better than great actually. We brainstormed ideas for drawing attention away from the Westboro nuts at the premiere.”

“Wankers.”

“And, he had a few good ideas for the next round of press, since the first wave went really well. And, drum roll please,” Harry tapped out a rhythm next to his lace-clad hips, “the contract was finalized today. Pre-pro with Nolan starts in less than a month.”

Louis squealed in excitement. “So, so, so proud of you. Don’t think a day goes by that I don’t think about what a difference you’re making.”

Harry could say the same thing about Louis. Strong, brave, kind, and fucking gorgeous. Harry leaned to the side, caught up in just _looking_ at his boyfriend, and nearly knocked over a candle. 

“Don’t burn yourself love, I want my prize in perfect condition when I claim it.”

“Like I said,” Harry argued gently, “that’s not the way this night is going to go.”

“I certainly hope you don’t plan on just tucking me into bed without getting me off,” Louis scoffed. 

“Patience, my dear.” 

Louis was slowing working over himself under the water, and Harry matched his speed, slowing trailing his fingers up and down his lace covered cock, causing almost imperceptive shivers. 

Louis was flushed, due in part by the heat of it the water, but mostly because of how incredible his boyfriend looked. He couldn’t pull his eyes away from Harry, teasing himself as he eyed Louis.

Harry stopped suddenly to pick up a fluffy towel for Louis. “I think you’re clean enough.” 

Louis scrambled to get out of the tub. 

▵▵▵

They finished the bottle of champagne as Harry dragged the towel over Louis’ body, taking extra care to dry his armpits. Harry might have nuzzled his face in the soft hair there, and also the back of his legs, which was made difficult with the bites and kisses he was providing along the way. Harry would have no problem admitting to an obsession with Louis’ legs, from his strong thighs to his dainty ankles, he loved every inch of them. The armpit obsession was his own secret. 

“Oi, you done back there?”

“Nope.” 

He picked Louis up and carried him over to the bed, dropping him gently before crawling across the bed to meet him. “Wanna taste you,” Harry murmured into Louis’ clavicle. He licked at the dip in his collarbones, mouthing at the soft skin and sucking bruises above the hard bone. 

Louis’ thrust his groin into the air above him. “I’m ready when you are.”

“Not what I want to taste…” Harry trailed down Louis’ body, spending extra time laving and biting at Louis’ tiny nipples until they were hard buds. Louis squirmed below him, letting out an occasional moan. 

Harry kept traveling south, using his thumbs to press Louis’ hips into the bed as he left a series of bruises with his mouth along his v-line. He then bypassed the thick cock standing at attention and moved further south, sucking in one ball at a time. More high pitched whimpers came from Louis. 

Harry eventually flipped Louis over, canting his arse up, forcing his back into an arch, his head resting on his crossed arms. 

“Lou, your arse… been waiting to get my mouth on it since I first saw it.” He bit up the back of one thigh, massaging his butt cheeks in the process, then back down the other thigh. “Please can I?” He bit into the flesh of his arse then licked over the teeth marks he’d left behind.

Louis whined before giving verbal consent. “Please. Yes. Now. Please.” He chanted until Harry finally positioned himself fully between Louis’ legs, his own cock trapped by a layer of lace that felt exquisite as he rutted against the bed. 

Harry tried to focus on the task at hand, pulling apart Louis cheeks and finally licking a long stripe from the bottom of his balls, to his puckered hole. Harry wasn’t sure he was going to survive this heavenly experience. He made it up to the dimples at the bottom of Louis’ back and left two smacking kisses. Then he moved back down, collecting his saliva until he was back where he wanted to be, thumbs opening Louis hole the slightest bit so Harry could lick around it. He made a few circles before he tentatively stuck the tip of his tongue in, causing Louis to push backwards as another stream of expletives fell from his mouth. He went back to licking the puckered hole and mixed it up with an occasional scrape of his teeth. His chin and cheeks were already wet from spit running down to Louis’ balls. 

Harry couldn’t get enough. He loved how everything about the experience was so Louis, from the taste on his tongue to the volume at which he was whining and moaning, to the way he kept trying to gain control, forcing himself back on Harry’s tongue, trying to get it deeper and deeper in himself. After a loud sob, the noises Louis was making stopped, and Harry reveled in the knowledge that he alone could render him speechless, could make him cry, from only his mouth.

He was fucking Louis with his tongue, little _uh uh uhhs_ coming from above him. Harry tried to hold off on his own orgasm, the familiar tightness coiling in his balls. His cock was so hard, and leaking, ruining the lace he had worn for his boyfriend. He added a finger next to his tongue, fucking in and out of Louis. He managed to refrain from rubbing off against the sheets below him, while adding a second finger. He went back to licking around Louis’ wet rim as he finger fucked Louis, curling and rotating his fingers until he found that pocket of nerves that made Louis cry out again. 

Louis was begging between sobs for Harry to let him come. His whole body was tight, strung long, with his fingers clawing at the bed, sheets long since pulled off the corners of the mattress. Harry continued to press against his prostate in tiny circles, not letting up even for a second, and switched from kitten licks to scraping his teeth along the edge and Louis became impossibly more taut, totally strung out. With a loud whine, forced from his lungs and strained throat, Louis lost it, coming hard, untouched, as he pulsed out white ropes of come across the bed. One last thrust against the sheets and Harry ruined his lace panties, pushed over the edge by Louis’ clenching hard around his fingers and the quiet cries that followed. 

He kissed his way back up Louis’ body, gently flipping it back over so he could take a good look at his wet glassy eyes, red tear-streaked cheeks, and bitten lips. Louis was totally exposed. He gulped in deep heaving breaths as Harry told him over and over again what a good boy he was, how he tasted so lovely, how he took it so well, that he was the most gorgeous person he had ever seen. Slowly Louis’ breathing returned to normal with his eyes closed, biting his lip raw. 

Harry looked around at the mess they made, come-covered sheets pulled off all four corners of the bed, and Louis sprawled boneless in the middle of it all. He’d deal with it in the morning. “Come on baby, I’m going to carry you into the spare.”

Louis linked his arms loosely around Harry’s neck as he swooped him up and carried him bridal style down the hall. Harry left Louis’ side just long enough to fetch him a bottle of water and blow out all of the candles. When he returned Louis was in the same laid out position as when he left. After he gave Louis a few sips, Harry stripped of his lingerie. Once they were cuddled under the covers, Harry checked in again. “You okay darling, it wasn’t too much?”

Louis collected a shuttering breath and shook his head. “Not too much,” he finally managed to string together. “I’d never—It was my first—” Harry pulled his boy closer to his chest, gently kissing his face until Louis finally drifted off to sleep. 

Harry smiled to himself in the darkened room, he’d count the night as a success. He felt honored that Louis had trusted him with that, and that he was able to make his first time so overwhelmingly pleasurable. 

He wanted to do it over and over again for the rest of their lives.

▵▵▵

Harry woke up in the early morning, arms still tightly wrapped around Louis. He watched Louis sleep, snoring quietly, more heavy breathing than proper snores, and he realized that he had to tell Louis the feeling that had been building for weeks. Bright sunlight came through the blinds in stripes across Louis face, and he was just so beautiful that Harry had to take a calming breath. 

He had to tell him before he lost his nerve like he had done a handful of times already.

Harry ran a hand across the fringe on Louis’ forehead. “Lou. Lou Bear,” he whispered in his ear. He trailed some kisses across the scattered freckles on his cheek and up the bridge of his nose. “Lou, wake up.”

Louis cracked an eye open. “Why?” His voice was thick with sleep.

“Come on, love.”

Louis curled tighter into Harry’s arms. “Don’t like mornings.”

“I know sweetheart, but I couldn’t wait.”

Louis rutted softly against Harry. “That hard up for it, huh?”

“No. I, that’s not,” he sputtered, “I mean, I’m always up for it, but no.”

Louis whispered conspiratorially, “Can feel just how hard up for it you are.”

Harry barked out a laugh. 

“I love you.” He swiped over Louis’ cheekbone with his thumb. “I love you,” he said again, a touch more sincerely this time, without the laugh. “That’s what I woke you up to say.”

Louis’ eyes flew open. “Careful, I could get used to this. Waking up in your arms. Declaring our love for each other each morning.” He pulled Harry into a kiss. “I love you too.” He pulled back after only a moment. “Arsehole, can’t believe we’re doing this the first time with morning breath.”

“That’s how you know I mean it, still love you even with your morning breath.”

Louis groaned and then blushed an alarming shade of red. “And the last thing you ate was my arse.”

Harry snuggled even closer to Louis, matching as many body parts together as he could. “Mmm, love your arse.” 

“More than you love me?” Louis grumbled. 

“Close second.”

He turned just enough to give Harry’s nose a quick kiss then settled back in as the little spoon. “Keep holding me?”

Harry kissed the nape of his neck. “Yes, of course, always.”

As he fell back asleep in the morning light, cuddled tightly together, Harry was so thankful that he had, against all odds, found his home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First, thank you to Irishvelvet! This was so much fun to write! Hope you liked it!
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> I also need to give proper thanks to [dimpled-halo](http://www.dimpled-halo.tumblr.com/) and [baserunning](http://www.baserunning.tumblr.com/). Thank you for muddling through my multiple drafts - this is so much better thanks to your suggestions and edits!
> 
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> Thank you, [gettingaphdinlarry](http://www.gettingaphdinlarry.tumblr.com/), as always, for your help. Every time you beta for me I feel like Iearn so much and it’s always a lot of fun. Thank you Thank you Thank you for setting aside some time for me even with how busy you were this summer!
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> And last but not least, thank you to anyone who offered to help (or offered to help me find someone who could help...) with details on how the Youth Academies work in England. [olieolieoxnfree](http://www.olieolieoxnfree.tumblr.com/) [hevab](http://www.hevab.tumblr.com/) and [anhcor](http://www.anhcor.tumblr.com/) you were all wonderfully helpful. Any details I still managed to get wrong are on me. Apologies if that happened! 
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>  
> 
> And also to my GC who had to listen to me whine and/or pump my fist throughout the whole process and who helped with specifics when I couldn't think of *exactly* what I wanted to show. And who are generally the most supportive wonderful people I know.
> 
>  [Here's a rebloggable tumblr post, if you'd like to share!](http://louandhazaf.tumblr.com/post/151190252640/title-my-only-working-remedy-author-yesisaworld)
> 
> Come [say hi to me on tumblr](http://www.louandhazaf.tumblr.com/) xx


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